Suit #1: So how many tombstones do we have?
Suit #2: Four.
Suit #1: All right. So we got the client, the CPA and the attorney…We gotta figure out how to get one more person involved.
–22nd & Broadway
Overheard by: E.B. Dresner
Suit #1: So how many tombstones do we have?
Suit #2: Four.
Suit #1: All right. So we got the client, the CPA and the attorney…We gotta figure out how to get one more person involved.
–22nd & Broadway
Overheard by: E.B. Dresner
Guy: What do you like, then? What do you like?
Girl: Progressive rock.
Guy: “Progressive”? Meaning…to change with the times?
Girl: Yes, I guess as opposed to conservative rock.
Guy: There is a conservative rock?
–Barnard College elevator
Overheard by: tiddlypomtiddlypom
Guy: Do you know what the word “ontological” means?
Chick: Yeah…I have seen it before…
Guy: Yeah. Me too.
Chick: Is it like an orange?
Guy: Yeah…Well, it’s something weird like that.
Chick: I know what you mean.
–Hungarian Pastry Shop, Amsterdam Avenue
Overheard by: Marie Favorita
Southern man: Well hon, maybe you should buy both; keep the large one and find someone to give the small one to.
Southern woman: Hmm, who do I know that needs a Statue of Liberty?
–Broadway & Canal
Mom: So why didn’t you come to dinner?
Dad: I don’t like you.
–44th & 9th
Overheard by: puppy
Guy: Motherfucker of God!
Chick: That would be Joseph.
–60th & Broadway
Overheard by: James Wolf
Woman: I see you will be engaged by the end of the year!
Businessman lady: Great!
Woman: So can I give you a full reading?
Businessman lady: No thanks, I got a fortune cookie in my lunch.
–28th & Park
Teen girl: I would like to. Notwithstanding, I–
Old lady: Never say “notwithstanding” in New York. Too long a word for here.
Teen girl: Why the heck…?
Old lady: Notwithstanding and two financial empires have already
collapsed! Where are you from, by the way?
Teen girl: Missoula, Montana.
Old lady: You’re making my point, darling!…So, Redford says “notwithstanding”? No kidding?
Teen girl: Robert lives in Utah.
–Trump Tower elevator, 56th & 5th
Overheard by: Bertrand Latour
Tween girl #1: Aren’t you gonna wash your hands?
Tween girl #2: I don’t need to. I flush with my foot
Tween girl #1: Do you also wipe with your foot?
–Union Square Regal Cinemas ladies’ room
Chick: Wait, people are still inside.
Professor lady: I should do a head count. 2, 4, 6…Wait, I don’t know how many people we started with.
–22nd & 11th
