Dad to daughter: Upper East Side? The East Side is full of snobs. Did they take you there?
Daughter: Yeah.
Dad: Great, great.
–114th St & Broadway
Dad to daughter: Upper East Side? The East Side is full of snobs. Did they take you there?
Daughter: Yeah.
Dad: Great, great.
–114th St & Broadway
Hobo to 20-something girls: How about some money?
(girls ignore him and keep walking)
Hobo: How about a threesome?
Girls: Are you serious?
–SoHo
Overheard by: I don't think so
Girl #1: One day I want to be as famous as Daisy Quaid Lionfish.
Girl #2: Who?
–Broadway & 6th St
Overheard by: Too Much
Guido in Mercedes, honking horn: Yo!
(jogging hottie ignores him)
Guido: Can I talk to you?
(jogging hottie ignores him)
Guido: What's wrong with me, no date?
(jogging hottie ignores him)
Guido: Is it my hair, my clothes?
Jogging hottie, taking off headphones: I don't date Mercedes C230s.
–West Side Highway Jogging Path
Overheard by: La Diabla
Unattractive fag hag: So we went out Friday and he slept over afterwards.
Gay male friend: I knew it!
Unattractive fag hag: Yeah, but then like, the next morning, I was in the other room and I overheard him talking on his cell phone and he was saying something about how I was a brown bagger. What does that mean, that it was in the bag? Like, I'm a slut?
Gay male friend: Uhhhh… something like that.
–L Train
Blind lady #1: Hey there honey, how have you been?
Blind lady #2: I've been good.
Blind lady #3: Where were you last week? I didn't see you at the meeting!
–23rd St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Adam
Big black lady with yellow weave: Hey! Get off of my breasteses!
Toddler son: Why?
–Marine Park, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Katie
Student: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving, monsieur?
NYU French professor, with heavy French accent: Bien sûr! I'm as American as apple pie!
–NYU Classroom
Fat old guy: That was refreshing.
Fatter old guy: Yeah. But it's like a dog chasing a car, though–what would you do with it if you caught it?
Fat old guy: Go to jail?
Fatter old guy: Yeah. (chuckles) Sixteen'll get you twenty.
–Hamilton Square
