Teen girl #1: Yeah, Florida is totally North of New York.
Teen girl #2: Are you kidding me? No, it’s not.
Teen girl #1: Yeah, it is! I mean, like, you drive North to the airport, right? And South of New York is just, like… water.
Teen girl #2, staring in disbelief: Wow.
–5th Ave
Overheard by: Shocked
Grunge rocker teen on cell: Oh, yeah, the book A Wrinkle in Time… It’s, like, one of those books they make you read in sixth grade… Yeah, sixth grade. Six… Like, two divided by three — six.
–Q88 bus
Overheard by: Michelle
Teen #1: Sometimes I fantasize about having a baby with him just so I could be attached to him forever. In fact, last night I was looking on the Internet for when your most fertile days are… And mine is today.
Teen #2, laughing: Well, I definitely don’t ever want to get pregnant. Those nasty maternity clothes… Ew.
Teen #1: What?! I like the maternity clothes better than regular clothes!
Teen #2: Nah, fuck maternity!
–Port Authority Bus Terminal
Teen girl #1: I hate riding in her car.
Teen girl #2: I know! It smells like dog, and then you look like dog.
–Bushwick
Overheard by: -|
15-year-old girl #1 tapping cigarette box: I totally think that these make me look classy. A person with a box of cigarettes just looks classy.
15-year-old girl #2, giggling: Yeah, I don’t know what he’s talking about. Cigarettes look way better in a mouth than a penis.
–7th Ave, Park Slope
Overheard by: Stereotype or caricature
Teen chick #1: You think I’m ghetto, son? I bet you can’t even spell ‘ghetto.’
Teen chick #2: Yeah? G-E-T-T-O.
Teen chick #1: Ahhh, you stupid! It’s G-H-E-T-T-O. You can’t even spell ‘ghetto.’
–Prospect Park
Teen girl #1: I’m so hungry. Can we got to Taco Bell before the show?
Teen girl #2: Ewww! Don’t go to Taco Bell! They have rats there!
Teen girl #1: Whatever! The rats are on the floor, not the food!
–Manhattan-bound L train
Hobo: Hey, doggie. Come here, doggie. Hey, hey, doggie. Come over here.
Woman, pulling dog away on leash: Come, Mikey! Come on!
Hobo, to passerby: You see that? Fuckin’ racist don’t want me touchin’ her dog ’cause I’m fuckin’ black!
Teen passerby: No, sir, it’s because you are homeless.
Hobo: Oh. Well, yeah. There’s that.
–Clinton & Montague, Brooklyn Heights
Overheard by: Mike N
Teen girl: The Notebook was mad sad! I cried.
Teen boy: What is it about?
Teen girl: I forgot.
–1 train
Mother: Honey, what is wrong with your eyes?
Teen daughter: I am stoned.
Mother: You look like you have allergies.
Teen daughter: I am stoned.
Mother: Maybe it’s pink eye.
–Central Park
