Black guy #1: I don’t want a fucking lawn.
Black guy #2: But that’s the American dream.
Black guy #1: I swear, you have become such a bitch since you moved to Georgia.
Black guy #3: Yeah, that nigga’s got a screen door.
–West 4th between Sullivan & MacDougal
Drunk girl: So, the bill is $80, the tip should be $16, right?…So $80 and $16 is $136…We’ve got $150 here, that’s more than enough, let’s take $10 back for the cab…So are we really going to Scores now?
–White Horse Tavern, Hudson Street
Overheard by: Laura Fenton
Little Chinese girl: You don’t understand anything!…Just shut the hell up.
Passerby: I thought Asian kids were supposed to be polite.
–14th & 6th
Overheard by: Djlindee
Hobo: Anyone have any spare change or medicine for lice?
–Christopher St. station
Overheard by: Matthew Dyke
Hobo: Excuse me, excuse me, sir, do you have change for a 12?
–West 4th Street
Singing hobo: I just spilled, I just spilled, I just spilled my blackberry brand-ayyyy.
–14th St. & 6th Ave.
Overheard by: wayne mitchell
Hobo: Folks, help me out. I am trying to get my rotor blade fixed on my helicopter!
–W. 10th and 7th Ave
Overheard by: Alex Wipf
Connecticut woman: It was such a joke among my friends; I was always going out with artists or unemployed people…which I guess is the same thing.
–Cuppa Cuppa, East Village
Girl on cell: I knew it was over when I grabbed his shirt and he told me I was pulling his hair.
–Bleecker & W. 11th
Overheard by: Alaska
Guy: Yeah, but the guy’s the Michael Jackson of dishwashing…
–Houston Street & Avenue B
Overheard by: Andrew Williams
20-something woman on cell: Did I tell you mom got into a fight with a raccoon again? (pause) Yeah, I know, our mom is totally going to die of rabies.
–Starbucks, West Village
Overheard by: Vaccinated for rabies
Guy to another: Flap your wings baby, just flap your wings!
–Broadway
Woman, shouting at no one in particular: You know I'm unstoppable! I'm like an ox!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Rose Fox
NYU girl: My mother was like, "what would you do with a giant inflatable turkey?" and I was like, "what wouldn't you do with a giant inflatable turkey?"
–3rd Ave & 14th St
Overheard by: Mickey
College kid #1: So basically I didn’t jerk off for a week so I could bust a huge load in her mouth. Have you ever done that?
College kid #2: Yeah, but never purposefully.
–Houston & Ave of Americas
Gay man in hipster glasses, sticking ass out: Papi! It hurts! Open it up and see what's wrong!
Blonde white girl, whining: But what does that meeeeeeannnnn?
–Bleecker & Perry
Short white guy: Y'know, you remind me of James Earl Jones.
Tall white guy: Who'zat?
Short white guy: What?
Tall white guy: Oh, wait, is he black?
Short white guy: No, I think he's Chinese.
Tall white guy: I have a Chinese friend.
–W 4th St & Jane
Overheard by: Anthony
