Guy with thick New York accent: Come on, let’s go.
[Dog lies down on back.]Guy: Don’t do that Mahatma Gandhi shit!
–Washington Square Dog Run
Overheard by: KidUgly
Guy with thick New York accent: Come on, let’s go.
[Dog lies down on back.]Guy: Don’t do that Mahatma Gandhi shit!
–Washington Square Dog Run
Overheard by: KidUgly
Random female tourist: Excuse me, can you tell me which way is the river?
Random angry new yorker: Which one, lady? You’re on a fucking island.
–9th & Broadway
Overheard by: Elan
Headline by: Jess
Runners-Up:
· “”Oh, Sorry. I’m Looking For, Um (Reading Guidebook) ‘Duh Fuckin’ River Wit Dah Steel Bitch Innit’…”” – Mike Chmiel
· “And That Was All Reba Needed For A Good Country Song” – cbeck
· “Generic Tourist ‘To Do’ List: “Get Insulted by New Yorker: – Check!” – Bassmanbish
· “Shit…Can You Tell Me How to Get to New York Then?” – lisa
· “The Map Crisis in America Doesn’t Just Apply to Beauty Pageants” – Erin
Blonde with group of tourists: Is New Jersey that way? [Points toward the west.]New Yorker: Yes, but there’s a river between here and there.
Blonde with group of tourists: You mean we can’t walk there?
New Yorker: Not really.
Blonde with group of tourists: Damn girls, what are we going to do tonight? We can’t go to Jersey and there’s nothing to do in New York.
–40th & 6th
Overheard by: Jersey, the state that never sleeps.
Professor: Old people will sign anything.
–Brooklyn College
Professor: What do you guys think of this poster? It annoys me. I would wear this on a t-shirt just to annoy people.
–Pratt Institute
Sociology professor: New York is a megalopolis, while Boston is only a metropolis, although Bostonites would argue that… Bostonites… Bostoners… Bostonians? Pshhh, whatever.
–Fordham University
Overheard by: Sromeo
Philosophy professor, drawing: Here is the world… Here are some birds… And people. Here’s someone… Here’s someone hitting someone with an ax. Some people do axings… Some people don’t.
–Fordham University
Overheard by: no axings!
Old professor with French accent: Hot climate is associated in this book with passion or sex. I think that I, for example, really never did have sex in a sub-zero temperature.
–NYU Cantor Film Center
Overheard by: suddenly surrounded by students’ awkward snickers
Sociology professor: I’ll tell you a story that most people laugh hysterically at, but it actually makes me really sad… Kind of like Napoleon Dynamite.
–Fordham University
Overheard by: Sromeo
Tourist suit: Excuse me, can you tell me where the Empire State Building is?
Guy: Just look up, man.
–32nd & 5th
Overheard by: still looks up
Tourista #1, about street sign with large bend in middle: Why does the Gershwin Way sign have a curve in it like that?
Tourista #2: I think it’s to symbolize Gershwin’s music.
New Yorker passerby: A truck backed into it, ya stupid bitches.
–NW corner, E 50 St & Broadway
Overheard by: Big Larry
Guy is riding Vespa in bike lane, and girl opens her car door, nearly taking him out.
Girl: I’m sooo sorry about that.
Vespa guy: No, it’s my fault.
Girl: Well, fuck you, then.
–Chelsea
Old man, with wife: How much is it to Elmont Cemetery?
Car service dispatcher: Will that be one way, or round-trip?
–E 19th St & Ave U, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Arthur
Guy who just got empty seat: My day just went from good to great!
Tourist lady: Oh? Why was it good?
Guy: I got to hug my therapist and talk about bogus relationships.
Tourist lady: [Stunned silence.]Guy: TMI?
Tourist lady: Ummm, yes [giggles nervously and turns away].
–6 train, Grand Central
Overheard by: Christine
Tourist guy with big camera: Can I take your picture?
Young woman sitting on a bench, reading: Sure.
Tourist guy: Can I get a smile?
Young woman: Um, no.
–City Hall Park
