Guy #1: Dude, if you google “bunny porn” it will probably show up.
Guy #2: Good call.
–NYU’s Hayden Hall
Guy #1: Dude, if you google “bunny porn” it will probably show up.
Guy #2: Good call.
–NYU’s Hayden Hall
Little boy holding pack of Orbitz gum: Mommy, is this kosher?
Mother: Sweetie, how many times do I have to tell you that we aren’t Jewish?
–Duane Reade, 50th & Broadway
Overheard by: Kyle
Big black guy: I thought she was goin’ to get an abortion?
Tiny Rican girl: Yeah, but she overslept and missed her appointment.
Big black guy: How do you miss an abortion appointment?!
Tiny Rican girl: Well she’s only seventeen, she’s not really responsible yet.
Big black guy, yelling: Well then maybe she shouldn’t have been thinking about sex yet! For Christ’s sake she missed her abortion appointment! What a whore!
–H&M, Brooklyn
Overheard by: SaraSil
Hipster girl: So I keep thinking inanimate objects are things.
Friend: They are things.
Hipster girl: I mean like thinking things.
–NYU
Little boy: Daddy, daddy! I wanna make a bear!
Buff dad: Nigga, I done told you a thousand times, thugs don’t make bears! [Tiny black boy bursts into tears.]
–Outside of Build a Bear Workshop, at 6th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Becca
Teen girl: So I found a picture of him on facebook, half-naked, being straddled by some fourteen-year-old with a bottle of Jack Daniels in her hand. I swear, my brother has all of my precocity, but none of my charm.
Older guy: Oh yeah, and none of your humility either.
–96th & Amsterdam
Overheard by: kids these days…
Little girl to her father: Stop telling me that! I’m not adopted!
Father: But sometimes I wish you were.
–Multiplex Cinemas, Flushing
Overheard by: Ms. Hazard
30-ish suit: I don’t think you really like me, just the *idea* of me. You know, I come off great at parties, and I make a lot of money, but really…
20-something hippie girl: Wait, wait…I just wanted easy sex.
–Union Square
Black girl #1: So why did you decide to come to New York?
Black girl #2: Because I hate white people.
–NYU
Overheard by: Cracker Apparently In the Wrong City
Woman in elevator: I am so glad they are finally making stylish maternity clothes. I mean, honestly, when I am pregnant I can’t just like stay home and sit with my kid in me. I want to go out and shake my ass.
Her friend: I know, thank god.
–Elevator
