Drunk #1: That girl’s got legs up to her lunchbox.
Drunk #2: Yeah, but there ain’t a lot of protein on them bones.
–Fred’s Bar, South Bronx
Drunk #1: That girl’s got legs up to her lunchbox.
Drunk #2: Yeah, but there ain’t a lot of protein on them bones.
–Fred’s Bar, South Bronx
Chubby girl #1: See the girl in this James Bond poster? If my face got a little skinnier, that haircut would look hot on me.
Chubby girl #2: I'm not sure your face will ever be that skinny again…
–E Train
20-something woman on cell: I thought I was pregnant because I was nauseous all the time, but then I realized I was just always hungover.
–111th & Broadway
Overheard by: Ladle
Guy to chick: What the fuck did she get pregnant for? She needed to lose some weight.
–Bowery
Hyper chick: He got me knocked up with this giant pretzel!
–LIRR
Overheard by: Pretzel Vendor
20-something girl to friend: Oh, so you're thinking because it's Memorial Day weekend you're gonna get preggers?
–Hoyt-Schermerhorn Subway Sation
Guy, about a couple who'd broken up: She came back to pick up her shit, and when you come back to pick up your shit, you know, shit happens, and she got pregnant.
–Bed-Stuy, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Ashley
Lady suit on cell: Well, unless you want to get me pregnant, I'm not sure I see a way around this!
–Columbus Circle
Girl: Yeah, like I mean, I would definitely say that I was in the best shape of my life when I had my eating disorder.
Guy, after long pause: Uhhhhh… at least you're honest!
–Fordham University
Overheard by: Rachel
Woman #1, bumping against woman #2 in stairs: Relax!
Woman #2: You relax!
Woman #1: No, you relax!
Woman #2: You relax!
Woman #1: You have a fat ass!
Woman #2: You need to accept Jesus into your heart!
Woman #1: You have a fat ass!
Woman #2: Accept Christ into your life!
–Yankee Stadium
Fag: Women have life so easy.
Hag: I know, life is like served on a plate to women but they're on a diet so then they pick out all the good stuff and push the plate to the side.
Fag: Too bad the diet doesn't do anything, cause they're still fat and complaining.
–Wendy's, 57th St
Teen: When I was young and fat I used to dream about scooping out my fat with a teaspoon. I was a deeply disturbed child.
–C train
Hobo: I had a wife! She was 389 pounds and had three stomachs. Now, I know a man never runs from his wife, but after a night with her — call me what you want — but I ran.
–C train
Little girl: All ugly and fat people should be banned from the train.
–4 train
Hipster: Have you ever seen a fat girl in spandex on weed?
–Union Square
Chubby teen chick: Bacon and soda, that’s my fucking bread and butter!
–14th & 1st
Overheard by: Bread and butter, that’s my fucking bread and butter
Fat lady eating pizza: Well, you know, I figured this was just as good as a salad…
–JFK
Overheard by: Wondering
Skinny girl: I ate the whole bag.
Fat girl: I know.
Skinny girl: But, like… The whole bag.
Fat girl: I know… If it makes you feel any better, I had fried chicken wings and chocolate cake on Friday.
Skinny girl: … Yeah, that does make me feel better.
–Pratt Institute
Chick #1: Well, no, you look better now, but you were never that skinny, I mean, I never looked at you like “she needs a sandwich”, like…
Chick #2: No, but I haven’t gained any weight, really; my clothes still fit.
Chick #1: But you were never grotesque, like what’s her name.
Chick #2: Nicole Ritchie.
Chick #1: Yeah.
–55th & 8th
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Girl #1: Dude, that apartment was so ridiculousy small. No fat people would be able to walk in our hallway.
Girl #2: Like we’re friends with anyone who’s fat.
–6th & Houston
