Stripper: The makeup lady is finally here! I need to go get my eyelashes put on, ’cause I feel naked without them.
–Tens, 21st & Park Ave South
Stripper: The makeup lady is finally here! I need to go get my eyelashes put on, ’cause I feel naked without them.
–Tens, 21st & Park Ave South
Mother: Here you go, honey. (hands clothing to daughter in dressing room)
Daughter: A 14? Mom, I'm a size 10! I know you think I'm morbidly obese, but…
–Bay Terrace, Queens
Overheard by: tinabee
Girl #1: You never wear earrings.
Girl #2: You’re very observant.
Girl #1: But that’s why we have ears, to get them pierced.
Girl #2: No, we have ears so we can hear.
Girl #1: Wait, you make no sense.
–E 16th & Ave U, Sheepshead Bay
Girl: Damn, when my grandmother see me in this, she gone have a strizzoke!
–Filene’s Basement, Union Square
Guy #1: You know her?
Guy #2: Yeah! The girl with a face like a chipmunk…Poor thing’s gonna die a virgin.
Guy #1: She’s married.
Guy #2: Married? Married to what?
–F train
Girl: I want a Marc Jacobs bag, and I don’t care if it’s made of baby cow!
–Outside the Met
Overheard by: wants baby cow bag, too
Guy, explaining his pants: Yeah, they look gay, but they make my junk look huge.
–Midtown
Man picking up trash to woman picking up trash: How you gonna make ten dollars an hour and have people making minimum wage looking better than you?
–Madison Sq Park
Shopaholic: I know! One time I thought there was more to life than that. But then I went back to Bloomingdale’s.
–59th & Madison
Overheard by: DM Cook
Teenage girl on phone: So where are you?…So,what happened?…Not to your shoe! In the hospital!
–Central Park
Overheard by: concerned trespasser
Cougar-in-Training, looking at non-trendy partygoers: Clearly they don’t belong here.
–Rooftop party, the SoHo House
Joking clerk to bitter man holding wife’s purse: Nice purse.
Man: Thanks. It came free with the relationship and subsequent castration.
–Fashion Ave
Overheard by: I think it was Dior
College girl #1: You know, I'm so leftist. Like, almost at communist level.
College girl #2: Well, their flag *is* pretty sweet.
–NBC Store
Overheard by: Amanda
Queer passerby: Oh my god, you look amazing! I love that skirt!
Chick, to friend: Don’t you love outfit validation from a gay man?!
–12th & Ave A
Overheard by: Jodi
Hipster guy #1: It was ridiculous though, ’cause he had these glasses.
Hipster guy #2: Yeah?
Hipster guy #1: Yeah, and they were so ridiculous. They were nerdy, but not cool nerdy, they were like, ironic nerdy. You know?
Hipster guys #2 & #3: Yeah, totally.
–Laguardia & W 3rd
