Guy: You know that song If I Had a Hammer? Who sings that?
Girl: The Carpenters?
–South Street Seaport
Guy: You know that song If I Had a Hammer? Who sings that?
Girl: The Carpenters?
–South Street Seaport
Accounting lady: What did you do to your hair?
Mailroom guy: It’s called the wet look.
Accounting lady: Oh yeah? What’s that?
Mailroom guy: I sprinkle some water on my head.
–Office, 58th & Broadway
Girl #1: I’m getting my hair cut when I go home next week. I don’t trust New York hairdressers. Last time, they charged me too much and gave me a crappy cut where one side was longer than the other.
Girl #2: It was probably some sort of hipster thing, that’s why it cost so much.
Girl #1: What, like I’m paying a licensing fee to rebroadcast her creativity on my head?…I guess so.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Julia Kite
Girl: Who’s that on your t-shirt?
Guy: Well, it says “New York Dolls”…
Girl: Is that Led Zeppelin?
Guy: Um, no, it’s the New York fucking Dolls!
Girl: Asshole.
–Beauty Bar, East 14th Street
Little girl: You know who has a weird name?
Mom: You mean an unusual name?
Little girl: Yes. The librarian. Her name is Constance.
Mom: Oh, that’s an old name, like yours: Sadie.
Little girl: But they’re bringing it back. I hear a lot of people in the park say, “Come, Sadie!” Especially to golden retrievers. That’s why I’m begging you to get me a dog.
–D train
Chick: Yeah, this book, Lions and Witches and shit; I like to read weird shit and send it to my boyfriend in jail.
–2nd Avenue station
Overheard by: Amanda Morante
Chick: Ugh….Just remind me to never eat Taco Bell on an empty stomach.
–Lorimer Street/Metropolitan Avenue station
Girl #1: Um, excuse me? Excuse me?…Excuse me, I need to get out here…Excuse me, I need to get out here.
Girl #2: Don’t fucking push me!
Girl #1: I said “excuse me,” you stupid fucking bitch! And by the way, your music sucks!
–L train
Overheard by: Lilit
Girl #1: You talk like you’re from an entirely other universe.
Girl #2: I am. It’s called Los Angeles!
–1st Avenue & 6th Street
Overheard by: miss dubin
Girl #1: She wouldn’t even take his name?
Girl #2: And she even refused to hyphenate? That’s ridiculous.
–6 train
Girl #1: …and I went on the American Nazi Party website, and it’s–
Girl #2: I know! It’s hysterical.
–26th & Park
Overheard by: Kevin Stone
