Old Lady: Those kids in Columbine used to bully kids themselves. I saw an interview with one. You think the parents didn’t know something was going on, the way they used to dress up like Hitler?
Black Nurse: Really?
Old Lady: One of them was half-Jewish, too!
Black Nurse: That don’t make sense.
Old Lady: They think they’re hot stuff. They don’t care.
–W Train
Young man in Vancouver: “It’s so hard to meet anyone here who is Jewish!”
Four teenagers in a convertible at a stop-sign speaking about me as I cross the street right in front of them, in Vancouver: “Hey, he looks Jewish!”
Asian Kid: The fucking Triads are on your tail, bitch. Run!
Hispanic Kid: Fuck that! The Latin Kings will pump lead into your asses.
Black Kid: Nah, the Bloods and Crips will beat you down.
Jewish Kid: Yo…Um…I’ll get my yarmulke peoples to smack you all, son. What now nigga spic chink bitch ho? Suck my matzoh balls, bitch!
–Canal Street
Overheard by: Jonathan Harris
Junkie #1: He’s a millionaire…just gives his money away. He’s a Jew bastard. But he writes his check like a chicken scratch.
Junkie #2: Oh, they can’t write anyway.
–Meth clinic, 161st Street
Diner: How adorable! Confirmation?
Mother, with two adorable little girls in white dresses: Communion. No, wait. Baptism.
Diner: Whatever. I'm Jewish.
–Pizzeria Uno, 81st St & Columbus
Girls on bench: Is US weekly magazine, like, the only one that's true?
–Central Park
Man on cell, crossing street: And I told that Jewish cunt that everything she's heard about black men is true, and I'm gonna stick my foot in her fucking mouth.
–46th St & Madison Ave
Bum conversing with Bible-toting teens: Yes, it's in the Bible… But is it true?
–Union Square
Skater boy: Most things aren't true.
–72nd St & Amsterdam
Teenage girl #1: I go to a Christian school.
Teenage girl #2: Aren't you Jewish?
Teenage girl #1: Yeah, they love me. They think I'm the chosen one!
–3rd Ave & 15th St
Railway announcer: This is the train to Ronkonkoma, next stop Jamaica, Queens.
Little boy to dad: See, dad… I told you he said “yarmulke”!
–LIRR
Overheard by: Charlotte
Guy: Matt is making me watch Schindler's List.
Girl: I like the part where they kill the Jews.
Guy: Yes, that's a very well-executed scene.
–91st & 3rd
