Wednesday One-Liners Need a Pamprin

Woman: When it’s a tampon, you can stick it anywhere.

–59th St

Overheard by: Rich

Woman on cell: …and then this big glop of bloody goop came out, and so I reached into the toilet and squeezed it to make sure it wasn’t a baby…

–13th & Broadway

20-Something chick: My shit bled like it’s never bled before.

–Elevator, 57th & 6th

Overheard by: Matt

Mulleted queer: Imagine if Virginia Slims designed a tampon!

–Bushwick, Brooklyn

Overheard by: ‘nuther black charlie chaplin

Creative genius: Just imagine if I had a tampon gun!

–St. Mark’s

Woman on cell: Well, you can’t just go handing out sanitary napkins to everyone!

–15th & Union Square East

Loud girl on cell: Yeah, so he was going for it, and I was like, “No, baby, I can’t tonight,” and he was like, “Why?” and I was like, “I got it today,” and he was like, “Aww, then nothing for a whole week!”

–CVS, 58th & 9th

Overheard by: Kate Melvin

Posted on April 8, 2020
Advice, All Wednesday One-Liners, Blood & bleeding, Menstruation, One-liners, Poop, Pop Culture, Sex, Wednesday One-Liners, Wednesday One-Liners Vary, Weirdness, Wishes & desires

Wednesday One-liners Have Cool Spiny Backs and Tiny Tiny Brains

Woman: That movie’s so stupid! They got King Kong and the dinosaurs fighting even though they are from different centuries.

–Mama’s Pizza, 106th & Amsterdam

Overheard by: Kyle T

Teen girl: You know, I don’t think I even believe in dinosaurs.

–Starbucks, Astor Place

Overheard by: Paul

Posted on April 7, 2020
Manhattan, Movies, One-liners, Pop Culture, Stupidity, Teens, Union Square and East Village, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

Is It Too Late to Give You a Puzzle?

Teen ghetto girl: If you had a daughter…
Teen ghetto boy: If I had a daughter, there ain’t no way she’d be leavin’ the house with them short shorts and shit. And she fo’ sho’ wouldn’t be playin’ with them barbies. Barbies is evil. They mess with girls’ brains, makin’ them think they need to show off their shit and have babies when theys like 15. No barbies. Only puzzles.

–Manhattan bound N train

Overheard by: lauren

Posted on January 29, 2020
Clothing, Gangstas, Ghetto Chicks, Kids, On the Subway, Pop Culture, Teens

It’s Because FTL Killed 40% of His Brain Cells

Guy #1: The horse?
Guy #2: SJP.
Guy #1: S…J…
Guy #2: Oh, for God’s sake: Sarah Jessica Parker! Don’t be so innuendo-challenged; nobody will invite you anywhere!

–Bedford & Clymer, Williamsburg