Frustrated hobo: What are you looking for?
Batty bag lady: A car!
Frustrated hobo: Well, what kind of car?
Batty bag lady: A car I can pee between!
–Eldridge & Broome
Overheard by: Nic
Frustrated hobo: What are you looking for?
Batty bag lady: A car!
Frustrated hobo: Well, what kind of car?
Batty bag lady: A car I can pee between!
–Eldridge & Broome
Overheard by: Nic
Female art student: I love people who fit into a stereotype!
Flamingly gay art student: I like being racist.
Female art student: What?!
–NYU
Suit: That's why I can't help but love New York. New York is like the sick uncle that touches you when no ones around.
–Grand Central Terminal
Girl, after passing a tourist bumping into her: In New York we say "excuse me!"
–Macy's, Herald Square
Overheard by: The City Planner
Guy to friend: Are we in the inner city or just the city?
–1st Ave & 6th St
Dude walking out of Penn station: You know what's great about going out in New York City? You can get completely bombed and it's no big deal, because you'll probably never see those people again, you know?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: BPV
Aussie: The key to this city is to use words like "shitter."
–96th & Columbus Ave
Salesguy: Would you ladies like to come in? Can I help you find anything?
Chick #1: Oh, no thanks.
Chick #2: The perfume's too much for us.
Salesguy: You could hold your noses.
Chick #2: Uh, I think we'd pass out eventually.
Chick #1: Yeah, you don't want that. Ambulances are bad for business.
Salesguy: I've always wanted to ride in the back of an ambulance!
Chick #2: Um…
Chick #1: Actually, it's a bit of a role reversal. We're waiting for my husband to finish shopping.
Salesguy: Oh, which one is your husband?
Chick #1: He's right there.
Salesguy: The one with the ponytail? Looks like a vampire? Hot.
Chick #1: Uh, yes, that's him.
Salesguy: Boy, you're one lucky lady.
Chick #1: I know. Thanks.
Salesguy: Hey, does he have a brother?
Chick #1: Yes.
Salesguy: Just kidding. Does he have a sister?
Chick #1: No.
Salesguy: Oh. Well, I was still kidding. You sure you don't want to come in?
–Outside The Body Shop, 76th & Broadway
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Man reciting gospel on a train: And you, sir, have you accepted Jesus into your life?
Passenger: A long time ago, baby. Now fuck off.
–1 Train
Thin white guy, handing out show fliers: You like white people?
Huge black guy wearing leather jacket: Why, yes I do!
–Times Square
Overheard by: Hanna
Older gentlemen: How much did this boat cost?
Younger guy: 1.6 billion dollars. It’s the only boat of its kind.
Older gentlemen: Well that ain’t for us; we think it’s for us but it’s for the tourists…
–The Guy Molinari
Overheard by: Lou
Hobo: Can I ask you a Republican question?
Girl: Yes.
Hobo: Do you like Christmas?
–1 train
Chick #1: Did you make out with a hooker?
Dude: I didn't *make out* with anyone!
Chick #2: Did you seventh-grade kiss a hooker?
Chick #1: Did you seventh-grade *think* about kissing a hooker?
Dude: I didn't even know she was a hooker until twenty minutes into our conversation!
–F Train
Hipster dude: Do you guys carry any men’s shoes?
Salesgirl: Yes, they’re on the wall behind you.
Hipster dude: Do you have any straight guy shoes?
–Barney’s, Madison Avenue
