Trendy female college student: I feel dizzy.
Twinkie male friend: Did you eat anything today?
Trendy female college student: No… but I looked at a picture of an English muffin yesterday and I'm still full.
Twinkie male friend: Hmmm. You're sure you're not hungry?
Trendy female college student: Eh… Can you get me a bagel? Not like a real bagel, but a picture of one?
–V Train
Overheard by: eating disorders arent funny
College boy #1: Do we have balls?
College boy #2: I don't know.
–6 Train
NYU grad student #1: So, he texts me and is like “hey.”
NYU grad student #2: Ew!
NYU grad student #1: I know.
NYU grad student #2: Like, what does he want? A conversation?
–Walgreen's, 14th & 4th
Overheard by: Shannon
Cop to another: Are you drunk yet?
–Corner of 145th St
Frustrated-sounding NYU student to friend: Well, why don't you get a girl and you can just pretend she's drunk?
–Washington Square
Future rabbi: So my philosophy professor, Lenny Kravitz, told us we'll be drinking scotch in class tomorrow…
–4th & Broadway
Drunk black guy arguing on phone: Man, you need to stop drinkin'. Not only is yo speech gettin' slurred, but yo brains is gettin' slurred too!
–NJ Transit
Overheard by: Ashley
Dude to friend: I swear to god, every time he gets a little buzzed he thinks he's Austin Powers.
–40th & 7th
Overheard by: thivnav
Woman on cell, sitting at counter: The baby's not out yet…as in "it's still inside her."
–McDonald's, Varick Street
Overheard by: Jordan
College student: It's like taking candy from a baby…only, ya know, I'd ask the mother first.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Dara
Dork walking by Babies "R" Us with friends: Dude, look! I totally wanna buy a baby!
–Union Square South
Guy on cell: That shop smells like babies!
–Union Square
Drunk man in Santa hat to all train passengers: I know all you ladies want to have babies for Christmas, but there's no time for it! Close your legs, there'll be less heads.
–L Train
Overheard by: Handley Elizabeth
Drunk guy on St. Patrick's Day to group of students by McDonald's: You guys want a fucking cheeseburger that fucking bad, huh?
Young teenager, sarcastically: Actually, I'm a vegetarian.
Drunk guy: Then what the fuck is this for?
Young teenager: Tofu and salad.
Drunk guy: Fuck this!
–Times Square
College dude #1: So what do you think of Williamsburg?
College dude #2, with a look of mild distaste: Oh, it's pretty cool, but it's such a scene!
–Bedford Ave & N 7th
High school girl to raucous group of friends: Oh man, remember the time we dared him to lick the church?
Group of friends: (wild laughter)
–Outside Grace Church, Broadway & 10th St
College boy #1: The no-pants subway ride was fun.
College boy #2: Dude, they should combine that with that “go topless day”!
College boy #1: I know! When all the pictures are on the internet, it will save us all the trouble of having to jerk off between two different websites.
–NYU, Washington Square
Overheard by: Jaime L.
Confused student: Wait, who did Obama run against?
Smart student: McCain!
Confused student I though Bush ran against McCain.
Smart student: No! Bush and McCain are in the same party.
Confused student: Right. (pause) Wait, Bush is a Republican?
–High School
