Woman (wearing red pants & with red fingernails): I just made the greatest discovery: if I always dress in red, then I will always match and always look good! I’m now in the middle of getting rid of all my old clothing and buying only red clothing.
— Subway
Guy #1: You should punch her in the face.
Guy #2: I can't, that's assault.
–The Strand
Overheard by: Firefly
NYU journalism professor: Okay, so who invented the European letter press in the 15th century?
Attentive female student in the back: Jesus!
(TA giggles)
–NYU
Guy #1: The Great Cock Hunt? Isn’t that a Hunter S. Thompson novel?
Guy #2: No, you idiot. It’s a gay porn site. What kind of mo are you?
–Starbucks, 23rd & 8th
Guy waiting on passport line: I'd like an expedited passport.
Postal worker: Oooh! Going anywhere fun?
Guy: Florida.
–Post Office, Brooklyn Heights
Overheard by: BLSwhatwhat
Woman: I always thought the Purple Pieman was Satan. Isn’t that one of his many names?
–K-mart, West 34th Street
Overheard by: CC
Southern woman on cell: I could not feel worse than I do right now…You will…Oh my god, they are gonna have to land that airplane so you can vomit.
–66th between CPW and Columbus
Overheard by: Charlie
Dirtbag: Man, I have to get over to Europe. I gotta sell a fucking kidney.
–St. Mark’s Place
Man on cell: Yeah baby, yeah, I’m still in London. Yeah, I’ll be back on Wednesday, baby.
–West 4th & Jane
Conductor: You’re now entering the country of Brooklyn. Please have your passports ready…
–F train
Overheard by: Paul Eng
Girlfriend: So, you want to make out?
Boyfriend: Both of us?
Girlfriend: Uh… yeah, generally that's how it works.
–A Train
Woman rushing out of train: Does this train stop at the next stop?
Guy: No.
–downtown C train, 59th St
Shirtless hobo #1: I lived in California before New York… the weather sucks most of the time there.
Shirtless hobo #2: Yeah, dude, I've heard that.
–Washington Square Park
