Wednesday One-Liners: So Lifelike!

Girl: If I made a sex doll that smelled like elk, he would totally do it!

–Queens

Middle-aged Latino: I've got barbie dolls!

–Brooklyn

Overheard by: Confabulation Nation

Newspaper vendor: Cause I have that multiple sneezing thing! I hate that crap! I'm like a bobble-head doll!

–96th St & Madison Ave

Overheard by: Galatea

Girl leaving nail salon: It looks like Malibu Barbie just threw up all over my feet.

–11th St & Broadway

Overheard by: Bill

Despondent little girl in coffee shop: Um, I don't play with the doll house that much because you said we're not supposed to play in the meditation room.

–Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn

Posted on June 3, 2021
All Wednesday One-Liners, Animals & Nature, Body Parts, Brooklyn, Compare/Contrast, Girls, Gripes, Kids, Kink, Latinos, Queens, Sensory Experiences, Street, Stupidity, The Village, Upper East Side, Vendors & Street Performers, Vomit, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Yoga

Name The Punchline

Girl: I’m, like, the token one. I’m the only lesbo there!

–West 4th and 6th Ave

Overheard by: Jamie

Posted on May 30, 2021
Gays and Lesbians, Girls, Gripes, Lesbians, The Village, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport

We Compromised on 'Bad'

Hair stylist: So what kind of band is your boyfriend in?
Magenta-dyed customer: He says it's Emo, but it sounds like the soundtrack to Spring Awakening.

–Supercuts, 6th Ave & Waverly

Overheard by: Jeffrey

Posted on May 27, 2021
Clerks, Compare/Contrast, Customers, Film, Music, Questions, The Village

Every Episode Of Laguna Beach, in a Nutshell.

Teen girl #1: I'm thinking about buying more clothes!
Teen girl #2: Clothes! Lets go shopping!
Teen girl #1: I know! Dad's money is the best!

–2nd Ave & 12st St

Overheard by: James

Posted on May 17, 2021
Clothing, Compare/Contrast, Money & Class, Shopping, Teens, The Village

Too Late!

African American emo guy to friends: I don't know if this is derogatory or not, but I was thinking of inventing pussy in a can. For those droughts, ya know?

–Lafayette St & W 4th

Posted on April 30, 2021
Black People, Friends, Science, The Village, Vagina

Not Having to Think Frees Up a Lot of Time for Watching Reality TV

Dude with clipboard to couple passing by: Excuse me, you two! Sign this! It’s your independent right as an American.
Guy: No, thanks. I hate rights.
Chick: Yeah, just being told what to do rocks.
Guy: Conforming is sweet.

–Bleecker St

Posted on April 1, 2021
Comebacks, Couples, Default, Offers and requests, Politics, Stupidity, The Village

Ay Carumba!

Latina: People are always saying I look Asian. Do you see it?
Asian guy: Well, you know, Mexicans look a lot like Asians.
White girl: Yeah, they have those same narrow eyes.
Asian guy: And they’re short.

–Amy’s Bread, Bleecker Street

Overheard by: Rich Mintz

Posted on March 19, 2021
Asians, Fashion, Latinos, Manhattan, Multiculturalism, Overheard Style, Restaurants & Cafes, Stupidity, The Village

Symbiosis in the Gay Ecosystem

Queer: Hey! Nice tits!
Morbidly obese fag hag: Hey, thanks!

–Metropolitan & Humboldt

Overheard by: dani d

Posted on March 17, 2021
Compliments, Fag Hags, Queer guys, Rack, The Village

Still the Sweetest One I’ve Ever Heard in New York

Man: You got the prettiest laugh I’ve ever heard!
Pretty girl: Aw…
Man: If you pee on me, I’ll let you laugh a lot more!
Pretty girl: Oh. I was going to say that was the sweetest catcall I’ve ever heard, but then…

–Mulberry & Spring

Overheard by: has that ever worked for you?

Posted on March 8, 2021
Creepsters, Pick-up Lines, The Village

Who Knew Ruxpin Would Become a Basehead?

Drunk chick #1: Look, I have, like, fucking trackmarks. It’s like a hole!
Drunk chick #2: Oh my God! It looks like a teddy bear!

–W. 4th between 6th & 7th

Overheard by: Kaitlen

Posted on February 20, 2021
Bimbettes, Compare/Contrast, Drinking & Drunk People, Drunks, Girls, The Village

The Village

Too Late!