Black lady #1: Do you like cheese?
Black lady #2: Cheese?
Black lady #1: Cheese…
Black lady #2: (…)
Black lady #1: Cheese, cheese!
–New York Port Authority
Overheard by: Igor Petrov
Black lady #1: Do you like cheese?
Black lady #2: Cheese?
Black lady #1: Cheese…
Black lady #2: (…)
Black lady #1: Cheese, cheese!
–New York Port Authority
Overheard by: Igor Petrov
Girl: What does “patronizing a prostitute” mean?
Guy: Uh, it means picking up a hooker.
Girl: Oh. Well, that's what my cousin's boyfriend just got arrested for.
–N Train
Drunk woman on cell: Come out with us! Don't go to bed. You're a realtor. Realtors don't sleep.
Drunk man, stealing cell phone: Hey–get over here. You're a realtor. You don't sleep, you don't eat. You're a realtor.
–Bleecker & Macdougal
Overheard by: Emily
Dude: It's all koala!
Friend: Haha, dude! Koala bear!
–81st St
Overheard by: personally perfers polar bears
(baby is crying)
Mother: You better stop crying when I count to three. One… Two…
(baby stops crying, but starts again after a while)
Mother: I said “two!”
(baby stops crying again)
–BX9 Bus
Overheard by: Jason
Waitress: Will you have a soup or salad?
Girl: Sure, I'll have the super salad.
Waitress: No, will you have the soup or salad?
Girl: I said I'll have the super salad.
Waitress: No, (really slowly) will you have the soup or salad.
Girl: Ohhhhh, the salad.
–Elmo, Chelsea
Stoner #1: Okay, so George Bush is our President, right?
Stoner #2: Yeah.
Stoner #1: If the Vice President dies, who's the President?
Stoner #2: Umm… George Washington.
(hysterical laughter)
Stoner #3: You bringing back niggas from the dead and shit.
Stoner #1: You just like my dad, we asked him who was the first President, he was like (imitates Asian accent) Oh, oh…okay, I know this, I know this… George Lincoln.
–Internet Cafe, Mott St.
Overheard by: Hugh
Female student #1: Yeah, I think I'd sleep with a guy just so he wouldn't kill me. It'd be pity sex.
Female student #2: That's not pity sex, that's rape!
–Columbia University Library
Overheard by: MizBehavior
Latin teacher: I don't think [Catullus] is exactly calling her a five-cent ho.
Student: Haha, he said ho!
–Packer Collegiate
Overheard by: Fred S.
Teen boy: May I be excused from the table? I have to take a shit.
Older teen sister: Ewwwww, you're disgusting!
Dad: Be thankful. At least we've got him eating with utensils.
–Buddha Bar
Overheard by: Big Larry
