Female coworker: I would pay for it.
Male coworker: You are paying for it, they're just not putting it in.
–16th & 5th
Overheard by: Brownsvillegirl
Female coworker: I would pay for it.
Male coworker: You are paying for it, they're just not putting it in.
–16th & 5th
Overheard by: Brownsvillegirl
Guy at bar: I’m sorry if I’m being an asshole.
Gay bartender: Oh, don’t worry -I deal with assholes all the time.
–Montien, 12th & 3rd
Short shaggy-haired guy: Hahaha, I know, right? (pause) Wait, I don’t get it.
Tall shaggy-haired guy: I don’t get it either, man. I just say stuff.
–3rd Ave b/w 14th & 15th
Guy: I like it when people copulate onstage.
Girl: “Copulate?!” What are you, David Attenborough?
–NYU
Drunk hobo #1 (in response to young person playing the guitar): Woohoo!
Drunk hobo #2: Why do you always have to be like that? It’s woo… hoo… Not woohoo!
–Washington Square Park
Hipster chick: It costs like $280 to go blonde, which seems expensive but it’s totally worth it because then you’re blonde.
–Hop Scotch
Overheard by: bildita
Hipster: My brother entitled all of his college essays "Heeeey Essaaaaay!"
–Smith Street & President
Overheard by: Michelle C.
(drunk or ill hipster guy lying on stairs moans pitifully and vomits)
Hipster’s friend, looking away and pretending not to know him: Ha! Fag!
–7th Ave
Young hipster: Let’s face it, at some point I’m gonna be homeless.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Conti
Hipster girl: Pickles are so in right now.
–Renegade Arts Festival, Williamsburg
Art teacher: This piece is from the enlightenment period in England and is called “Marriage a la Mode”.
Kid to friend: Wait… Marriage with ice cream?
–Bronx Science Art History Class
Overheard by: One with whipped cream please
Dad: So what’s that thing you want for your birthday again?
Little boy: A Wii.
Dad: Wii? As in wee-wee? Gross!
Little boy: You’re immature.
Dad: You wet the bed.
Little boy: You’re immature.
–1 Train
Customer to punk teenage girl behind counter: I’d like a dozen rolls, please.
Punk teenage girl: A dozen… What’s that, like twenty?
–Delicatessen, Park Place
