Middle aged white woman: You know, if you're not communicating with someone you can't just stick a potato up their ass and expect them to know where you're coming from.
Middle aged ponytail guy: True, true.
–Broadway Station Bar, Astoria
Middle aged white woman: You know, if you're not communicating with someone you can't just stick a potato up their ass and expect them to know where you're coming from.
Middle aged ponytail guy: True, true.
–Broadway Station Bar, Astoria
Guy to girl singing softly with her iPod: You are the worst singer ever!
Girl: You are the worst faggot ever!
–Starbucks, Wall St & Broadway
20-something guy on cell: My girlfriend's birthday is tomorrow. (pause) I don't know. Maybe a bong.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Steve Popovich
Girl to friend: I just wanted to hook up with him because we had the same birthday.
–8th St & 5th Ave
Rent cast member (shouting over shoulder): I turn 34 on Friday, I'm old but at least I made it past Jesus.
–Nederlander Theatre
Woman arguing loudly with her mother in the laundromat: My 30th birthday is gonna be ruined if we don't go to the wax museum!
–4th Ave & 14th St, Brooklyn
Guy handing out New York Post: Grab your free copy of New York Post, it's free, it's free! Oh, and happy birthday to me today, thank you very much for remembering it! Oh, what a lovely day…
–42nd & Madison
Overheard by: Eve
Drunk girl: People thought I looked good?
Guy: Yeah!
Drunk girl: How do you know?
Guy: Because they gave you money and licked stuff off your breasts.
–140th & Broadway
Overheard by: Logan
Young thug in crooked baseball hat to female friend: No, everyone should have the right to love Tom Cruise.
–41st & Lexington
40-something Midwest tourist to 40-something friends: Yeah, this is where Miley Cyrus was staying. (points to Sheraton hotel, friends gasp in excitement)
–53rd & 7th
Tourist son to mom: Let's go to the park and watch Jerry Seinfeld play softball.
–67th & Central Park West
Overheard by: Q
Random guy outside on corner: Yo, I just saw Phil Donahue. I just saw him walking down the street… (starts to sing in Cops theme song style) Whatchu gonna do when Phil Donahue comes for you? (pause) Yo, Phil Donahue is a crazy motherfucker!
–Astoria Boulevard, Queens
Girl on cell: Yeah, but I tower over him when I wear heels…and I'm not exactly sure if I'm ready to be Katie Holmes to his Tom Cruise.
–33rd & Broadway
Woman: Everywhere I go, I see either someone I know or a celebrity!
–69th & Columbus
Little boy to mother: Oooh…I thought Malcolm X was a singer.
–Flatbush & Beekman
Overheard by: Chelsea
Grad student: It’s like Hogwarts. Witches go to Hogwarts. They don’t go to Harvard Witch Management.
–Think Coffee, Mercer & W 4th
Overheard by: this analogy makes no sense
German dude to other German dude, in rapid German: Voldemort! And Dumbledore!
–96th & Broadway
Overheard by: LeLeLe
Teen girl: He said that Dumbledore takes it up the ass. Seriously.
–1 train
Overheard by: Silverhawk
High school thug girl: Yo dead ass, Harry Potter is hot.
–Houston & Green
Overheard by: chedr
Perverted tween: I wonder how many old women are into Dumbledore. They must be like "oooooohh! Dumbledooooooore!"
–D train
Overheard by: tanechka
Drunk 20-something woman on cell: I’ve fallen off the Voldemort wagon!
–Port Authority
Overheard by: McFreaky
Guy #1: She’s like a dull child acting out. It’s so transparent to everybody but her, that we know who she is talking about.
Guy #2: I wonder if they pay her in shiny buttons.
–Vanderbilt & 42nd
Overheard by: Joe Jervis
An attractive black girl wearing brown from head to toe walks by.
Stoner kid: Dude, if you squint, doesn’t that girl look naked?
–Fort Greene park
Overheard by: Saddened
Big black guy on bike: Yeah…it'll be a smokey party.
Skinny black guy: Yo…this school shit is whack–I got an ounce to smoke through, but I've been so busy with school… I mean, yesterday I only smoked three blunts.
Big black guy on bike: Ooooh, son. Ouch.
–Broadway & Washington Place
Overheard by: Sydney m
