Two hobos are checking out a woman walking by.
Hobo #1: You look like an angel fallen from heaven!
Hobo #2: The angel fallen from heaven is the devil!
Hobo #1: Oh…
–Lafayette & Franklin
Two hobos are checking out a woman walking by.
Hobo #1: You look like an angel fallen from heaven!
Hobo #2: The angel fallen from heaven is the devil!
Hobo #1: Oh…
–Lafayette & Franklin
Soulful black man: Well, think about this. A white man lived in Graceland, a black man lived in Neverland. (nods knowingly)
–Downtown A Train
Overheard by: Bearsian
Gallery director to intern: So after he was arrested we sent a letter to Henry Gates asking him for money, you know, since we are a multicultural organization.
–Lower East Side Art Gallery
Latina to Latino: Latinos and black people can't be racist. That's, like, just white people.
–Red Hook, Brooklyn
White hobo: When I see a black nigger together with a white nigger, that just confuses the hell outta me.
–Houston & Clinton
Woman: She likes black dogs because she's black, and I like white dogs because I'm white.
–Upper West Side
Overheard by: Yehuda
Lady: Sorry, I don’t have any change.
Hobo: Girl, I don’t want your money. I want your phone number!
–60th & Park
Overheard by: How exactly is he going to call her?
Well-dressed British man on cell, as he walks oddly: Listen girl, I farted so hard yesterday I blasted half my ass off. (pause) No, seriously! I am still walking funny!
–24th St b/w 6th & 7th
Overheard by: Joseph
Teenage boy to another: One time this hot bitch farted on my lap, and I didn't know what to do.
–12th St & University Place
Crazy hobo sitting on blanket: I used to wear underwear, but then I farted and left a stain, so decided no more. Can anyone spare any change?
–87th & Broadway
Overheard by: Nynanny
Girl from Louisiana: What can I say? I'm a Southern girl. I fart crawfish.
–McLean Ave, Yonkers
Woman on phone: Well, the romance is out of my life: this morning Greg came in my mouth, then straight away leaned back and farted.
–Beard St & Van Brunt St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: craig hunter
Toddler being pushed through park: Music!
Hobo, playing guitar: Give me cookies!
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Anna P.
A group of little kids are selling M&Ms on the train, perhaps to raise money for their school’s basketballing team. Homeless black dude with silver teeth enters and proceeds to yell at them.
Hobo: I WANT WHAT’S IN YOUR BELLY! I WANT WHAT’S IN YOUR BELLY!
–L Train
Overheard by: Vickers Bastard Gringo
Hobo: ‘Scuse me. You wanna give a quarter to the United Negro Pizza Fund?
–44th & 8th
Hobo: Listen, girls, do you care to donate to the United Negro Pastrami Sandwich Fund?
–Bowery between 3rd & 4th
Hobo: Would you like to donate to the United Negro Pizza Fund?
–82nd & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Leigh
Hobo: Can you offer a contribution to the United Negro I Didn’t Go to College Fund?
–60th & Columbus
Guy, to girl: Smart girls are never pretty. That’s why you’re a dumbass.
–Union Turnpike station platform
Overheard by: Erna
Hobo: Ain’t no good here, only cheap. Cheap, cheap, and very cheap. And very beautiful.
–L train, Bedford Ave station
Consoling friend: Just think about what you want out of it.
Crying girl: I really don’t know what I should do!
Eavesdropping hobo: Damn, bitch — do what the fuck you want!
–Washington Square Park
Hobo, yelling on the train: Oh, god, I know I've made a lot of mistakes. This is all my fault, but if you could just give me something to eat for lunch, or a nickel, anything!
(girl offers him an orange from her bag)
Hobo: No, that ain't food. Thanks anyway.
–Downtown R Train
Overheard by: Kinda have to agree
