Girl: Excuse me, is you popcorn kosher?
Counter guy: Um…I, ah, I dunno.
Girl: Do you even know what kosher means?
Counter guy: Hey, Geraldo. Is our popcorn kosher?
Geraldo: What the fuck’s kosher?
–Loews 84th Street Theatre 6
Girl: Excuse me, is you popcorn kosher?
Counter guy: Um…I, ah, I dunno.
Girl: Do you even know what kosher means?
Counter guy: Hey, Geraldo. Is our popcorn kosher?
Geraldo: What the fuck’s kosher?
–Loews 84th Street Theatre 6
Guy #1: Dude, where’s your woman tonight?
Chick: Yeah, where is she?
Guy #2: She’s back in Ohio breaking up with her boyfriend.
–112th & Amsterdam
Man #1: I dunno, Richard Pryor was too…gross for me.
Man #2: Oh yeah?
Man #1: Yeah…Pretty good for a guy that did a lot of drugs, though.
Man #2: Yeah.
Man #1: You know what I just found out? Hunter Thompson did a lot of drugs, too.
Man #2: Really?
Man #1: Apparently.
–Associated Supermarker, Bleecker Street
Overheard by: Gus
Hobo: Hey man, you got some change? I’m saving up for a bag of weed?
Guy: No! I prefer to pay for it myself!
Hobo: Yeah?…Well, I don’t!
–Bleecker & Sullivan
Girl #1: I have to go soon, I have a child at home.
Girl #2: Oh, an undead abortion?
–Hi Fi, Avenue A
Conductor: This is the last stop, New York Penn Station. All passengers must exit the train. Last stop.
Chick #1: Is this our stop?
Chick #2: Did he say Penn Station?
Chick #3: This is so confusing. It’s not like taking a plane, where you know your destination.
–NJ Transit train, Penn Station
Man: You dropped something.
Teen girl: What?
Man: You dropped something.
Teen girl: No, I didn’t.
Man: Yeah, you did…You dropped my heart.
Teen girl: Well, pick it up and put it back in.
–90th between Columbus & Amsterdam
Woman: What ever happened to Ceci?
Man: Ceci?
Woman: Yeah, Ceci. That little girl that got her fingers cut off. The pretty little crackhead with the beautiful soul.
–116th & Frederick Douglass
Overheard by: Melissa Berry
Junkie lady: Wow, that thing is nice, what year is it?
Yuppie guy: ’06, I just got it.
Junkie lady: ’06? That shit ain’t even here yet. You better put that in a garage, nigga!
Yuppie guy: I don’t have money for that or for you.
–Bed-Stuy
Overheard by: Art Vandelay
Guy #1: Dude, why are you texting my girlfriend?
Guy #2: She texted me.
Guy #1: I am going to call the whore right now.
–Lincoln Park, 9th Avenue
Overheard by: Mike DeVito
Speaker girl: Any questions?
Audience girl: Were you able to find out about how much women paid for the abortion procedures?
Speaker girl: About $200 a pop.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Julia Kite
