Pretty girl: I wish my boyfriend loved me more than he loves weed.
Less pretty friend: But you only like him for his weed.
Pretty girl: Oh yeah… Still.
–Penn Station
Pretty girl: I wish my boyfriend loved me more than he loves weed.
Less pretty friend: But you only like him for his weed.
Pretty girl: Oh yeah… Still.
–Penn Station
Woman in dress, after smooching with guy: But how?
Guy: Don't worry baby, I already told about you to my wife.
Woman in dress: Aww, baby…
–31st St & Broadway
Girl #1: You don't like him.
Girl #2: You don't even like him–and you date him!
–New York Law School
Evangelist, screaming to crowd: Fornication is wrong! It only leads to more sin!
Girl on cell: Should I go tell this evangelist that I'm on my way home to fornicate with my Jewish boyfriend that I'm living in sin with?
–Staten Island Ferry Terminal
French tourist girlfriend, arguing with boyfriend: Do you think I'm not being serious?I can't take it anymore!
French tourist boyfriend, with constant little smile: Tu trouverais pas cela plus stylé d'aller au bord de l'eau? (“Don't you think it would be much nicer to go on the waterfront?”)
(girlfriend leaves)
–Wall Street
Overheard by: Tom
Upright bassist: I want a really hot girlfriend who's like The Giving Tree, y'know, by Shel Silverstein.
More upright guitarist: Like, who gives and gives and never wants in return? Get real, man.
Bassist: I can dream, man.
–Union Square
Overheard by: The Glump
Girl #1: I'm sorry, Kelly, but if they are the poster child for good relationships, then Hitler should be on their poster.
–12th & 5th
Gay guy: Oh, I just realized I took Tyler's phone this morning.
Straight guy: That's what happens when you and your boyfriend get identical phones.
Gay guy: Brilliant idea–I'm going to text him now, and his name will come up in the caller id. I'll pretend to be him from the future and start making dire predictions.
(his phone beeps) Dammit, he noticed. I just got a text from Van-from-the-future.
Straight guy: You guys are an oddly perfect couple.
–87th St & 3rd Ave
Mother to four-year-old making loud, weird noises in stroller: Will you shut up? See… That's why you don't have any friends.
–Supermarket, Astoria, Queens
Overheard by: George O.
Woman on cell: She put my friendship on the line for a Chanel bag! (pause) So I guess I'm worth like, $600 dollars.
–Starbucks, Astor Place
Overheard by: Kade
Angry woman to man: You had to fuck my friend?! You couldn't think of a better place to put your dick?
–Elevator, 75 Wall St
Overheard by: Jonathan
Seated guy to standing woman: I was out drinking with a friend. Well, less of a friend and more my parole officer…
–L Train
Overheard by: Bradburnside
Suit to woman: I don't believe in friends, ya know?
–22nd & 6th
Overheard by: Edyna
Little girl #1: Do you have a boyfriend?
Little girl #2: Yes, and I hate him.
–Starr St.
Overheard by: Asizzle
