Girl to boyfriend: What, are you scared of jewelry?
Random man, walking out of jewelry store: I am!
–47th St & 6th
Girl to boyfriend: What, are you scared of jewelry?
Random man, walking out of jewelry store: I am!
–47th St & 6th
Drunken skinny pretty girl: Why is she so mean? I mean I'm a skinny pretty girl. She should not be mean to me!
–Halloween Party, Tribeca
Drunken hobo to girl leaving Sephora: Let me tell ya how to look beautiful. Fill ya buckets with money. Bucketfulla money makes ya look beautiful.
–17th St
Overheard by: Lillian
Voice on loudspeaker: Last call for pretty man. Last call to board for pretty man.
–LaGuardia Airport
Overheard by: Jen
60-something woman to tenor, after La Traviata: Finally, an Alfredo who is good-looking!
–Stage Door, Metropolitan Opera
Hobo: I was voted best-looking bum by bum weekly 1996.
–45th & 3rd
Man selling comedy tickets: Hey! You guys look like you would enjoy some comedy and free drinks.
20-something man: No, I hate all of those things.
Man selling comedy tickets: Jeez, you don't have to be so sarcastic.
–42nd & 8th
Overheard by: Comediphile
Teen #1: I can't believe you've never seen Rejected. It's all over the internet. You quote it all the time!
Teen #2: I do?
Teen #1: Yeah! “My spoon is too big!”
Random guy several seats away: “My anus is bleeding!”
Teen #1: Yaaaay!
Random guy: Now everyone on the train is staring at me like.Who is that weirdo? Except for you.
Teen #2, a minute later: What did he say about his anus?
–1 Train
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Comedy girl: Hey! Do you like stand-up comedy?
20-something power-walking girl: I hate comedy.
Comedy guy: I love you!
–48th & 7th
Old man: Wait–what you think you doing? This here's the line!
Lady in nurse scrubs: I just want to get a passport application.
Old man: Well, I just want to get a box. Everybody in this line just wants to get something.
(turns to next person in line)
Old man: What you want to get?
Next person in line: Some stamps.
Following person in line: A money order.
Old man: See, honey–they all just want to get something!
–Post Office, Bed-Stuy
Overheard by: Tigertail
Promoter, stopping college girls: Hey, do you girls like comedy?
Girls: (silence)
Promoter: Where are you two from?
(they look at each other, don't say anything)
Promoter: Helloooo? Where are you from?
(no reply)
Promoter: Are you guys retarded?!
(they storm off)
Girl #1 to girl #2: God! Someone would never say that to us in LA!
–Times Square
Overheard by: just visiting
Boy on street with basketball to car honking horn non-stop: Shut up!
Girl walking by: Well done! I love New York.
–Flushing, Queens
Out-of-place preppy: Hey, I think that's Grace. Isn't that Grace, dude? Grace! Grace!
Not Grace: Nope, sorry. It's Beth, actually. (keeps walking)
Not Grace's girlfriend: You know, you didn't have to tell them your real name.
Not Grace: I know, I just got excited.
–2nd Ave
Overheard by: Also Not Grace.
Passerby to driver making illegal turn: No red on right in Manhattan!
Driver: Well, I'm from Philly, so whatever!
–44th St
Overheard by: Rose Fox
