Guy #1: The menu is on the board.
Guy #2: What’s the sea red dumpling?
Guy #1: Sea red? What are you talking about?
Guy #2: Right there, monster…sea red.
–Dumpling Man, St. Marks Place
Overheard by: Rathan Haran
Chick #1: I’m nostalgic for the ’40s.
Chick #2: You can’t be nostalgic for an era you never lived through.
Chick #1: Fine. Then I long for the ’40s to the very depth of my soul.
Chick #2: From your loins?
Chick #1: Yes. My loins… They long for the ’40s.
–Herald Square
Teenage girl #1: Do you say, “Goose-pimples”?
Teenage girl #2: No…Jewish people say that.
–81st St
Overheard by: JAP
McSuit #1: Do you wanna head to the subway?
McSuit #2: You mean Subway, like the restaurant?
McSuit #1: No, I mean subway, like the fuckin’ subway.
–7th & Bowery
Professor: And what was the issue in this case?
Law student: The company was displaying won-ton negligence.
Professor: Okay, good, but some people pronounce it ‘wanton.’
–Brooklyn Law School
Hipster girl #1: Hey, get this one! It’s about the Dust Bowl!
Hipster girl #2: Ew, no.
Hipster girl #1: Why not?
Hipster girl #2: Because I hate the word ‘dust.’ It’s so sad.
–Strand Bookstore
Overheard by: Ahall
Teen chick #1: Yeah, but now they all like “woah!” and shit.
Teen chick #2: They all like “woah!”?
Teen chick #1: Yeah.
–Williamsburg, Brooklyn
Overheard by: dirtystan
Guy # 1: Dude, I’m hella hungry.
Guy # 2: I’m freakin’ hella tired of your whining, a-hole!
Guy # 1: At least I ain’t hella stupid!
Guy # 2: And you’re hella ugly!
Passenger, to guys: Are you from Jersey?
–C Train
Overheard by: Hammer-head
Tourist, to man handing out fliers: Thank you very much but I don’t need one.
Passerby: Tourists are fucking weird.
–Grand Central
Dude #1: Oh my god! Did you hear about Jack*?
Dude #2: No, what?
Dude #1: [Excited whisper.]Dude #2: He’s a what?
Dude #1: [Enunciates whisper.]Dude #2: No — a hobo is a homeless person.
–LIRR
