Girl #1: So after all that, can’ t you understand why I’m pretty much a full-fledged lesbian now?
Girl #2: In a way, but I think you could still be into guys. I have a hard time believing you don’t have feelings for Jarrod.
Girl #1: No, I really don’t. That’s done.
Girl #2: I totally support you. I just think, you know, there’s more than one way to eat a Reese’s.
Girl #1: Exactly.
–Metro North
Overheard by: ianbobian
Girlfriend: And ya know what? Just fuck you, okay? If that’s what you think, fuck you!
(Boyfriend sneezes)
Girlfriend: Bless you.
Boyfriend: Thank you.
Girlfriend: Awwwww… that’s the nicest conversation we’ve ever had!
–Central Park
Columbia nerd: I feel weird just knocking on the door and asking if he’s there.
Friend: That’s not weird though?
Columbia nerd: But they’re all hipsters and full of attitude and judgment. Those people intimidate me.
–Columbia University Campus
Overheard by: Mark Hussa
Staten Island chick to friend: Remember when we got off at this stop because some guy lied to us and told us we were in Brooklyn?
Uninterested friend to random guy next to her: I like your shoes.
–Brooklyn Bound 4 Train
Overheard by: Emma
Hipster girl: Why isn’t Ben coming to your party?
Emo friend: He’s going to see the vagina monologues… twice.
–NYU
(elderly gentleman in a brown suit with matching fedora walks by)
Ghetto #14 year-old-girl (screaming): Oh my god! It's a pimp! He's a fucking pimp!
Ghetto #14 year-old boy: Nah, he ain't a pimp. He can't be–he's like 90…and he's white.
–Under Broadway Stop, Astoria
Overheard by: well, it aint easy
Female employee #1: Have you seen the “Save Darfur” shirts? I want one.
Female employee #2: No.
(after ten minutes)
Female employee #1: See? Here’s the “Save Darfur” shirt. I really want one.
Female employee #2: What’s that?
Female employee #1: “Save Darfur”.
Female employee #2: What?
Female employee #1: You know, in Africa, where all that genocide is happening…
Female employee #2: Oh. (pause) I love the color!
Female employee #1: Yeah.
–Dressing Room, Urban Outfitters, 72nd Street & Broadway
Overheard by: ewg
Bottle blonde: Eww, listen to this: he asked me to have a threesome for his birthday.
Natural blonde: So are you going to do it?
Bottle blonde: Ewwwie! No.
Natural blonde: Yeah…that wouldn't be too fabulous.
–Washington Square Park
Drunk middle aged lady: Aww, love is great…you and your boyfriend are such a cute couple.
Chick: Oh, that guy? He's not my boyfriend. I'm just sleeping with him.
Drunk middle aged lady (laughing): Really? Good for you, he's cute. Well, maybe it'll turn into something more?
Chick: Oh, god no! He's an asshole…but he's amazing in bed and he's fun company… He's like a vibrator that makes appetizers.
–White Horse Tavern
Overheard by: the birthday girl
Guy: So you slept with her?!
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: You were supposed to be taking pictures of the drugs, not seducing her.
–Red Hook Boardwalk
