Is Anyone Else Kinda Aroused?

Bogan guy: Oh, I forgot to get you something for dinner tonight.
Bogan girl: I wish I could walk to the shops. It's alright for you, you wanna walk somewhere, you just go.
Bogan guy: You can't go to the shops, it's not safe.
Bogan girl: I really like walking. You know, I just go out on my own, and I'm outside…
Bogan guy: But it's not safe on your own, and it's so far away.
Bogan girl: Yeah, but I really like walking, walking is really cool. I really like it.
(pause).
Bogan girl: So, what, are you gonna have me eat two-minute noodles for dinner?
Bogan guy: For fuck's sake, I don't care what you eat! Walk to the fucking shops if you fucking want to! Just stop your fucking whinging!

Bus
Perth
Australia

Posted on October 26, 2015
Australia, Fears, Food, Rednecks, Shopping

Succubi Are Surprisingly Good Mothers, Considering

Small boy: [Runs up to his mother and hugs her around the waist.] Don’t take my soul!

Macy’s
Salem, New Hampshire

Posted on October 7, 2015
Fears, Guys, Kids, New Hampshire, Offers and requests, Stores, Weirdness, Wishes

Without Warning, It Leaped Out of Its Hiding Place

Girl to cross-dressing friends: …and then my butt scared him.

Gay Club
Denver, Colorado

Posted on September 6, 2015
Ass, Colorado, Default, Fears, Girls

And Kept Me Awake by Leading “Expeditions” Into My Sock Drawer

Girl #1: I found that doll the other day.
Girl #2: What doll?
Girl #1: The Steve Irwin doll, you know, the one that used to look at me creepy while I was sleeping.
Girl #2: Ohhhh, that doll!

Bleeker’s Bowling Alley
Chicago, Illinois

Posted on August 23, 2015
About celebrities, Default, Fears, Girls, Illinois, Questions, Weirdness

Ten Bucks Says He's a Collective Hallucination

Hot burner chick: Our bar was busy until the fat naked guy showed up and scared everyone off!
Fat naked guy: I'm wearing Uggs!

Burning Man
Nevada

Overheard by: Eavesdropper

Posted on August 13, 2015
Chicks, Clothes, Creepsters, Diet & weight, Fat people, Fears, Guys, Nevada, Shoes, Weirdness

Think We Could Get That Classified As a Learning Disorder?

Guy #1: Sometimes it's hard being a guy.
Guy #2: Why is that?
Guy #1: Well, I try to stay focused and get shit done, but every time a female walks by I feel obligated to turn around and check out her tits and ass. I just want to get through a project without being distracted by tits and ass.
Guy #2: Yeah, but don't you worry you might miss the world's greatest tits and ass?
Guy #1: Exactly!

Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: sean

Posted on August 4, 2015
Beauty, Body parts, Colorado, Default, Fears, Gender issues, Gripes, Guys, Questions

Oh Yeah, You’d Like Me to Pour You on My Meat

Guy to friend: My hot sauce packet is talking dirty to me.

Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Josh

Posted on August 2, 2015
California, Default, Etiquette, Fears, Food, Friends, Guys, Sexuality, Weirdness

Weirdest PTA Meeting Ever.

Girl on cell in crowded elevator: Walking through the naked women was supposed to represent, like, going through the birth canal!

Royal Ontario Museum
Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: painted_veil

Posted on August 1, 2015
Canadia, Cell phones, Fears, On the phone, Uterus

“Throw Your Brother Into the Campfire,” It Says

Little girl to mom: My stomach controls me!

Campsite, California

Posted on July 28, 2015
Body parts, Default, Fears, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Kids, Weirdness

And This Time Don’t Roll on Me Just Because They Offer You Cookies and Juice

Little boy: You used to have a pocket knife, mommy!
Mother, laughing nervously: No, I didn’t!
Little boy: Yes you did! You used to!
Nervous mother: No, I never did! I never had a pocket knife! Please don’t tell the police that!

YMCA
Hollywood, California

Overheard by: Muffin

Posted on July 25, 2015
California, Crimes, Default, Fears, Guys, Kids, Moms, Offers and requests, Violence, Weirdness, YMCA

Fears