Girl diner: You can order a tongue sandwich!
Guy diner: I don't eat anything that can taste me back.
–Ben's Kosher Deli
Overheard by: Pastrami Girl
Girl diner: You can order a tongue sandwich!
Guy diner: I don't eat anything that can taste me back.
–Ben's Kosher Deli
Overheard by: Pastrami Girl
Hipster on cell: I’m not even buying anything. I’m just here to be seen.
–Trader Joe’s
Hipster boy: I loves me some master race!
–Lobby, the Met
Overheard by: Shayna
Tipsy hipster girl: Wine is so, like, the blood of the gods!
–W 4th & Christopher St
Hipster guy: I think the most truly good person who’s ever been on this earth was Gandhi. Or maybe Martin Luther King, Junior… But he was black.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Ghandi was Indian..
Drunk chick: What kind of hipsters are you that you won’t fuck a girl just because she wants to wear a Sailor Moon costume?
–St. Mark’s Pl
White trash woman to angry boyfriend: Stop! I'm in my car and I love myself! I love myself! Fuck you if you don't love yourself! Tyra says to love yourself, and I love myself!
–49th & 11th
Conductor: Passengers, as you all know the New Haven line is known as the Love Line, because of our red colors and red schedules. For Valentine's Day why not buy a loved one a ticket? Nothing says "I love you" like a Metro North ticket! Imagine the look on your mother-in-law's face when she opens up her present to find a one way trip to Manhattan!
–Metro North Train
Sorority girl: And this is a list of all the girls who love Jell-o.
–St. John's University
Overheard by: Peter G
Guy on Bluetooth: What did I say? I said I love you and you didn't fucking say anything back. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?
–Jackson Heights
Excited black guy to friend: Damn! I think I'm in love, she's like the whole package! She's pretty, she's fuckable, and she can cook!
–A Train
Overheard by: Tim
Little boy leaving the church: Bye, Jesus! I love you!
–Riverside Church
Overheard by: Stephanie
Guy #1: I have a moral dilemma.
Guy #2: Does it involve alcohol?
Guy #1: No.
Guy #2: Does it require alcohol?
–F Train
Overheard by: Sarah
Straight guy: Uhm dude, I don't think he's gay.
Queer guy: So what? His fly was open.
–Central Park
Guy on cell: What does you caring about me have to do with me at some club with "hypothetical" naked chicks?
–42nd & Lexington
Guy yelling across street to girl on phone: Tell her I waited naked on the bed all night but she never came!
–Washington Square
Suit to another: It's so weird because there are so many people at the office who you'd never think to picture naked… Like Marcy: you'd never picture her naked. Alex: you'd never picture him naked. Derek: I've never pictured him naked.
–F Train
Overheard by: EmLo
Guy, to two women: I was like, "You're lying on top of me. We're naked. When does this get fun?"
–Philosophy Building, Columbia University
Overheard by: Ladle
(girl is wearing small, tight, mini-skirt and talking to a group of boys)
Girl: If it was up to me, I wouldn't be wearing any clothes, if it weren't for gravity.
–Sybil's, Liberty Ave, Queens
Overheard by: Terrence
20-something girl to friend: So I chased after him, but I was naked…so how far could I go?
–Brooklyn Promanade
Guy #1: Benedict? That’s a terrible name for a Pope!
Guy #2: What do you know? There’s been fifteen of them already!
–Columbia University
Overheard by: koaloha
Girl #1: I think spring is my favorite season, I mean, it's mating season… but I dunno, I also like the fall.
Girl #2: No, it's true, all creatures mate during spring.
Guy: Yeah. I mean, prom is during spring.
–111th b/w Broadway & Amsterdam
Dude: Is there a frog in here?
Chick: Sorry, I tooted.
–A train
Overheard by: nicole
Scruffy guy: Do cockroaches need oxygen?
Chick: Um… what?
Scruffy guy: Do cockroaches need oxygen?
Chick: I have no idea.
Scruffy guy: Cause I was thinking, if they do, maybe that's why we never see them in this elevator, where there is no oxygen.
–W 151st St & Broadway
Overheard by: Rose Fox
