This week’s Headline Contest: Here
This week’s Headline Contest: Here
Aspiring hipster: All I need now is a tattoo and a MySpace and I’ll be set!
–Oustide Around the Clock, 9th St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Molly
Blonde girl: Does anyone know if the subway has wireless connection?
–1 train
Girl on cell: Well, would you fix my computer for free? … What is it with guys who fix my computer wanting to be paid in sexual favors? You’re like the fourth guy to say that to me this year.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Vicksburg
Lady on cell: Well, have you asked him to close his MySpace account? Well, if he really loved you, he would close it!
–28th St, between Madison & Park
Overheard by: mommamoose
Teen chick on cell: Yeah, it’s funny… Google it. Wait, do you guys even have Google in Florida?
–54th & Park
Overheard by: floridian passerby
Teen chick: Oh my god! I am so putting that on the internet!
–Times Square
Chick #1: So, what are you going to talk about?
Chick #2: What’s there to talk about? The weather? Craigslist prostitution? That’s all I have on my mind these days.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: gotta love those elevator convos
Chick complaining about looking for roommates: The problem with today is that everybody’s Jewish.
–Dobbin & Norman
Overheard by: Sam Tresler
Young quasi-gangster to friends: Even if you’re not Jewish, you’re, like… Jewish.
–Post-Yankees game on B train
Overheard by: Indiana
Tourist chick: How, how, how can there be no Jewish deli? All I want is a tongue sandwich and a fucking piece of pizza!
–Grand Central Station
Overheard by: X-tal
Lady suit: Are you saying you’d rather be with a Jewish person than a wife-beater?
–18th & 6th
Overheard by: emily
JAP: Shiksas are totally not allowed on Jdate!
–71st & Columbus
Overheard by: DebDan
Chick in stall to friend: It must be a Jewish thing, but whenever there’s food around I have to eat it — even if I’m not hungry.
–Restroom, Loews Cinema, 11th & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Em
Queer: No, like, of course you’re not Jewish. I just wanted to check before I dissed the Jews.
–113th & Broadway
Overheard by: hilla
Girl #1: I’ve been doing eHarmony, and all of the guys they’ve matched me with have fit my personality really well.
Girl #2: I want to try eHarmony.
Queer: You’re getting married in, like, three months.
Girl #2: I know… I’m just curious.
–Uptown 6 train
Overheard by: I Know a Good Divorce Lawyer
Girl #1: I had to close my account.
Girl #2: Why?
Girl #1: I wasn’t creeping anyone out. Like, the other day some guy IMs me, and I tell him that I’m really into short guys, like five foot three and under, because I want to feel like I’m fooling around with a little boy.
Girl #2: What did he say?
Girl #1: He asked me if I wanted to meet up. Lavalife freak.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Alex
Ghetto girl #1: So I was all, “As if,” and she was all, “Whatever!”
Ghetto girl #2: Yo, dat’s some fucked up shit.
Ghetto girl #1: So when I got home, I totally unfriended her on MySpace.
Ghetto girl #2: I’ma hafta smack dat bitch up, fo’ realz!
Ghetto girl #1: Oh, just unfriend her! She’d hate that even more!
–S train
Overheard by: Joe Jervis
Hipster boy #1: I’ve decided to start a blog.
Hipster boy #2: It’s about time!
Hipster boy #1: I know. And I’m not doing it because of the peer pressure. It’s just for me.
–Bowery Ballroom, Delancey St
Girl #1: Why don’t you just email me?
Girl #2: Oh, let me guess: hotmail? You look like you use hotmail!
Girl #1: Yahoo…Wait, was that a come-on?
–R train
Overheard by: Michael
Teen girl: Wow! I just realized I haven’t been online all day!
–34th & 6th
Overheard by: Different Generation
Middle-aged woman: 50% of the population is allergic to wheat. They just don’t know it. It’s true– I read it on the internet.
–Port Authority
Guy: You should start a fight with her on MySpace.
–75th & Amsterdam
Guy: I’m pretty sure my cat has Down’s syndrome…You can read about it on my MySpace blog.
–Spice, Chelsea
Overheard by: DJR
Thug: MySpace is like crack, yo. I’m addicted to that shit.
–F train
Overheard by: Laurence Lau
Girl: Google is, like, totally taking over the world!
–Terminal 4, JFK
Overheard by: Jess McGins
Girl on cell: We need, like, a slutty web-designer friend we can bring in on this.
–Harlem
Overheard by: Buttons
Scruffy dude: I should just bring her a bunch of photos of my ex-girlfriend and slam them down and be like, “Find one, just one of these, that you’re hotter than.” I can’t believe she wouldn’t give me her e-mail address. She must be out of her mind. I mean, just give me a fake one. Like, something at hotmail.com. Anything!
–54th & 10th
Overheard by: Waiting for The Colbert Report
Guy wearing t-shirt that says “You are so off my buddy list”: So I am thinking about creating another website that’s Jedi-friendly.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Palmala Handerson
