Guy: I want to give you a Dirty Sanchez.
Girl: That better be the name of a drink!
Guy: Oh, it is…
–Canal & Broadway
Overheard by: Mellow_G
Guy #1: Well, Mike was the one that got us into bestiality.
Guy #2: Right.
–23rd between 8th & 9th
Overheard by: James R
Thug on cell: Will I accept payment in what? In coke? Fuck no, I won’t accept an eight-ball as payment. No. No way, bitch, I don’t care how pure it is. Uh-uh, the only coke I do comes in five dollar rocks. I can’t afford to get hooked on that expensive shit.
–49th & 7th
Oveheard by: Prefers the expensive shit
Drunk guy, to his date: The reason I’m buying all of this coke is so that we can fuck.
–6th St, between 2nd & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Danielle
Girl: Can you imagine saying your vows when you’re that coked up?
–Remsen St, Brooklyn Heights
Party girl: Oh my God, she took a picture of me one time while I was doing a line, and I was, like, so pissed!
–Sheep’s Meadow, Central Park
Dude: America runs on cocaine.
–W Broadway
Overheard by: ritajones
Goth chick: I just want to buy some fucking groceries so we don’t spend all our money on coke.
–Whole Foods, 14th St
Fordham girl #1: Is your miniature poodle white?
Fordham guy #2: No, she’s dead. But yeah, she was white.
–60th & Columbus
Suit #1: …so he’s got one hand on the car’s aerial, and with the other hand he’s punching a four inch by eight inch dent in the car, while running alongside. At this point it becomes destruction of property.
Suit #2: And that’s when the campus police got involved?
–52nd & 6th
Overheard by: Meredith
Queer #1: It’s too bad he’s not for sale.
Queer #2: I think you can rent him, though.
–BoConcept, West 18th Street
Guido #1: Tuna is not made from dolphins, bro.
Guido #2: I’m telling you, tuna fish is made from dolphins.
Guido #1: No way, bro, tuna are not dolphins!
Guido #2: Then what are they?
Guido #1: They’re…chicken of the sea.
–9th St. Path Station
Overheard by: Kevin M
Skater kid #1: I don’t like this whole “valet” thing, man.
Skater kid #2: You don’t trust them?
Skater kid #1: I DON’T TRUST ANYONE!
–8th St & 6th Ave
Crazy woman: I’m still alive and breathing, thank you very much, despite the best efforts of the Devil.
–Food Court, Grand Central
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Guy in line to pay, on cell: Hi. I’m calling to say I want a divorce. I keep calling and calling, and leaving messages, and sending you texts, but you never get back to me. So I guess this is it. I’m going to have papers drawn up unless you call me back. Okay, bye.
–J&R Computer Store, Park Row
Overheard by: Just trying to buy a PSP case
