Girl: If anybody is gonna bring back the cape it will probably be a
lesbian.
–Borders, Time Warner Center
Girl: If anybody is gonna bring back the cape it will probably be a
lesbian.
–Borders, Time Warner Center
Blind man: Excuse me ma’am, coming through…Excuse me, miss.
Woman: Damn! Watch yourself with that fucking walking stick! Shit! And how the fuck did you know I was a woman? Can that shit tell you genders too? Ha, ha!
Blind man: Not quite, but you smell like stale fish so I figured you were a woman. Have a nice day!
–E train
Overheard by: Shanny O.
Teen girl: I am pregnant again. How does this keep happening to me?
Teen boy: Ever thought of keeping your legs crossed?
Teen girl: How would that solve anything?
Teen boy : Huh?
–6 train
Spanish guy: Life is shit. You never know. Shit is shit. If you’re already smart and you make a computer, it’ll be fucking smart like in the movie AI. The devil at work like in Six Days with Schwarzenegger. Movies are like real ‘n shit. It’s bin Laden and that fucking Hussein, they’re in cohoots ‘n shit. They want to make us like them…a third world country ‘n shit.
Spanish guy: College don’t mean nothin’ ’cause you could fucking graduate with papers and shit, then someone’s friend gets the goddam job ‘n shit. It don’t matter ’bout college ’cause that fuckin’ asshole makes $70,000 so you got the college paper and that don’t mean shit.
Spanish guy: Best burgers is Burger King, but White Castle is the jam.
Spanish girl: Ew, no!
Spanish guy: No man, that shit is good, but only when the meat is fresh ‘n shit. Like they just cook it now ‘n shit. The only thing is if the bread is old ‘n shit or if too many onions ‘n shit. Yo, I made 50 bucks from my brother-in-law when I ate 53 ‘n shit. He ate 50. That was when I was husky ’cause I played football ‘n shit.
–D train
Overheard by: Valerie Velazquez
Girl #1: We need to think of a nationality for me.
Girl #2: Why?
Girl #1: Because at parties people always ask me what I am and I feel so boring saying “white”.
Girl #2: Say you’re Australian.
Girl #1: And Argentinian. I’m gonna be Australian and Argentinian.
–1 train
Teen boy: You’re just a little nigger.
Teen girl: Quit playin’.
Teen boy: I will break your fucking fingers, you little nigger.
Teen girl: But–
Teen boy: Shut the fuck up! I’ll fucking kill you. I’ll punch you right in the mouth in front of all these gay fucking white people. What do you have to say?
Teen girl: I–
Teen boy: Shut the fuck up! You think I won’t? You don’t think I’m man enough, do you? I’ll hurt you so bad. I’ll fuck you up. You think I won’t?
Teen girl: You will!
Teen boy: I won’t?
Teen girl: You will!
Teen boy: I won’t?
Teen girl: You will!
Teen boy: That’s right. All you wanna do is sleep all day. You wanna go to bed right now and sleep for four days, 24/7. Fucking worthless. You should fucking die for that.
–Q train
Overheard by: Carrie
Man: You’d better get out of the way.
Hobo: It’ll be $3 to get off the train.
Man: I’m getting off this train if I have to climb over you.
Hobo: Climbing over me is $5.
–5 train
Overheard by: BWA
Guy: It’s not that I’m against marriage. I mean, I like weddings.
–Sammy’s Roumanian Steakhouse, Chrystie Street
Guy: The only reason she was hanging out with those dudes is because she was hoping that one of them would kill me…But that’s neither here nor there.
–6 train
Girl: I know you’re not religious, but do you believe in dinosaurs?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Sasha
