Hobo: What you got?! What you got!? What you got?!
White frat boyfriend: I got hos, yo!
White sorority girlfriend: Hey!
White frat boyfriend: I’m not talking about you. I just mean in general.
–33rd & 7th
Hobo: What you got?! What you got!? What you got?!
White frat boyfriend: I got hos, yo!
White sorority girlfriend: Hey!
White frat boyfriend: I’m not talking about you. I just mean in general.
–33rd & 7th
Crazy guy: Do you see what I put up with? That’s it, it’s over. We have not had sex in ten years. She says she don’t need it…Then I have to sleep with nigger whores. That’s right, Joan, I said it. I sleep with nigger whores, even some white whores. That’s the only way I can get off now.
–Da Andrea, Hudson Street
Old Russian man approaches teen girl and says something in Russian.
Teen girl: What?
Russian man: You don’t speak Russian?
Teen girl: No.
Russian man: Oh, well you want job?
Teen girl: No.
Russian man walks away.
Girl’s mom: I think he wanted to hire you for an escort service.
–Sheepshead Bay train station, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Waiting for the bus
Bachelor: I’m going to find out where all the hookers are, and I’m going to buy that.
–2nd Ave & 5th St.
Hipster student: Yeah, man, we took Chinese already, but they’re making us start again in elementary ’cause we can’t write. All we know how to say is curse words and how to pick up hookers.
–Midtown Direct NJ Transit
Guy on cell: … Virtual strumpet.
–E 34th St
Overheard by: Krisztina
Young woman on cell: My apartment is not a brothel… My apartment is not a brothel.
–Tompkins Square Park
Suit to wife: Oh, wait, they’re not prostitutes, they’re just Italian.
–Per Se Restaurant, Columbus Circle
Hobo in skirt: Ladies, ladies! Sex for sale! Sex for sale! Satisfaction guaranteed or your money back!
–2nd Ave, between 8th & 9th St
Overheard by: Skyler Fox
Guy: My wife is just a hoot. She just tries and tries to undermine me.
–Craft, E. 19th Street
Girl: She’s into God and stuff like that. I hate that shit.
–C train
Overheard by: jason steinhauer
Slut: …all I know is that it’s $40,000 and you’ve gotta buy him breakfast in the morning.
–Dock’s Oyster Bar, 40th & 3rd
Overheard by: Greg Rutter
Man on cell: After I dropped Benny off at school I stopped by that harem.
–5th Ave, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Nerd
Old bald guy looking at Asian call girl section in newspaper, on cell, speaking very slowly and very loudly: Do… You… Take… Veee-saaaah. Veee-saaaah. Veeee-saaaaah! Yes! Visa! No? Okay, thanks. [Same exact dialogue takes place three more times.] Bingo!
–Milford Hotel
Overheard by: not an asian call girl
Guy: I’m a good Jewish son -I got 90% off on a hooker!
–Central Park
Guy on cell: Man, I love hookers. My friend just told me about Craig’s list. Shit, there’s like 5,000 hookers on Craig’s list. I love that shit.
–Fordham University
Overheard by: who knew?
Guido in leather jacket, to suit: So did anything ever happen with the whore?
–39th & Broadway
Overheard by: Ladle
Asian girl to friend: As long as I’m slutting myself out, I might as well get paid for it!
–22nd & 9th
Overheard by: Kate
Guy: Man, I don’t have any money… I wish I was a prostitute.
–Jackson Heights
Overheard by: Kay
Man on cell: She ain’t gettin’ it. I’ll tell you what we’re going to do — we’re going to fire all the women. The one time a month we need ’em, we’ll hire hookers.
–Washington Square Park
Man on cell: Don’t call her a prostitute! That’s my mom you’re talking about. You lived with her — was she a prostitute then? No, she was not!
–92nd & 1st
Overheard by: Jessie’s Girl
Suit: So have you considered prostitution? I’m not saying you should do it, but have you thought about it?
–N train
Hipster: She was movie hooker! You hardly ever see a movie hooker in real life!
–Central Park
Overheard by: wondering what they were talking about
JAP on cell: Fulton Street is big! Not as big as your appetite for hookers, but big enough!
–Broadway & Nassau
Overheard by: nbtd
Guy to friends at table: My dad owns a crackwhore house, and he wonders why his electric bills are so high!
–Whole Foods, Union Square
Overheard by: Genna and Elaina
Construction worker #1: My girlfriend is being deported.
Construction worker #2: Why, 'cause she's illegal?
Construction worker #1: No, 'cause she's a fucking whore.
–38th St & 9th Ave
Girl #1: One of the best things our country could do right now is legalize prostitution.
Girl #2: Really? One of the best?
–Outside Magnolia Bakery, 11th & Bleecker
Overheard by: cupcake fan
