A Rare Sighting of the Elusive Emetopodophile.

Drunk girl to friends: Wait! Wait, bitches, shut up! This is important!
[Drunk friends turn to her.]Drunk girl: I totally just threw up all over my own feet!
Drunk guy: That’s fucking hot!

–Brother Jimmy’s Bait Shack, 92nd & 3rd

Overheard by: rebecca

Headline by: Adam

Runners-Up:
· “1 Girl, 2 Manolos” – Allyson L.
· “And I Can’t Wait for Volume II Of “Girls Gone Ipecac”” – NotoriousAR
· “How Paris Found Her Catch-Phrase” – Janet
· “If By “Hot” You Mean the Temperature Of My Vomit, Then Yes, It Is Rather Hot.” – CL
· “It’s Because She Vomits Lava.” – Sean McGurr
· “Matchmaker: Remember, Girls. Chunks Turn on Hunks.” – NewFaceOfEvil
· “Usually I Have to Pay Extra for That” – As do I
· “When Fetishes Collide” – Jon

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Posted on May 5, 2008
Compliments, Default, Drinking & Drunk People, Drunks, Friends, Girls, Guys, Headline Contest Winners, Restaurants & Cafes, Sexuality, Upper East Side, Vomit

Now, If You Don’t Mind My Doing So, I Will Give You the Finger

Man: I noticed you’re reading The Kite Runner. How is it, if you don’t mind my asking?
Woman: Why would I mind if you ask me how the book is? You’re just trying to sound extra polite, and it’s annoying. Are you from the Midwest?
Man: Actually, I’m from Pennsylvania.
Woman: Even worse.

–F Train

Overheard by: nathaneast

Posted on May 5, 2008
Books & Writing, Compare/Contrast, Default, Etiquette, Men, On the Subway, Questions, Strangers, U.S. Geography, Women

Shallow Parents Have Trouble With Deep Kids

Male #1: I have a daughter that dresses like a hooker, and everyday I yell at her: “*Nicole! Stop dressing like a hooker!” …She’s a fucking cutter too!
Male #2: She cuts class?
Male #1: No. She cuts herself and she doesn’t even do a good job of covering it up either! How the hell does she expect to get a guy with all that shit on her arm?

–Marillac Hall, St. John’s University

Overheard by: Leonard Castell

Posted on May 4, 2008
Clothing, Dads, Default, Friends, Men, Offers and requests, Parents, Physical appearance, Questions, Relationships, School, Should've Used a Condom, Weirdness

I Support a Woman’s Right to Wear Fingerless Lace Gloves

Girl with clipboard: Excuse me, do you have a moment for gay rights?
College guy, not stopping: I love lesbian porn!

–116 & Broadway

Posted on May 4, 2008
Activists, Default, Frat Boys, Gays and Lesbians, Girls, Offers and requests, Porn, Questions, Students, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

My Next Question Was, “Did You Buy That at Hot Topic?”

Professor: Wow, you looked so tough! Like Michael Jackson in “Beat it”!
Male student: … That wasn’t tough.
Professor: Exactly!

–Brooklyn

Overheard by: Loli/Angie

Posted on May 4, 2008
About Celebrities, Brooklyn, Compare/Contrast, Compliments, Default, Music, Physical appearance, Students, Teachers/Professors

Explains the Doggie Sweater with the Red “A”

[Man with big dog is standing on the sidewalk. Man with small dog walks by. Small dog starts jumping at and around big dog.]Man with big dog: Is it a boy?
Man with small dog: Yeah.
Man with big dog: Oh, he better watch out! [Gestures to his dog.] She’s a slut!

–Washington Place, Outside Pless Hall

Overheard by: Caliban

Posted on May 4, 2008
Advice, Default, Gender issues, Man's Best Friend, Men, Questions, Sexuality, Strangers, The Village

Tragically, She’s Not Alone

Loud lady #1: What you gonna name yo baby when she pop out?
Loud lady #2: Merlot.
Loud lady #1: What?!
Loud lady #2: Merlot.
Loud lady #1: Marlin?
Loud lady #2: Merlot. Its a fine wine, dummy. The reason she be comin’ in to dis world.

–1 Train

Overheard by: TylerDavis

Posted on May 4, 2008
Babies, Default, Drinks, Friends, Names, On the Subway, Questions, Weirdness, Women, Words

Translation: “Die, Shrew. Die! Die!“

Wifey: Did you just see what happened?
Husband: Yes.
Wifey: That’s why you need to let people off the train first before you try to get on.
Husband: Okay.
Wifey: Next time, just follow me okay?
Husband, disgruntled: Okay.
[Wifey starts reading a book and hubby starts reading his morning newspaper.]Wifey, glancing at husband: You really need to clean your ears out -you have a big piece of wax in your ear!
Husband: Thanks for letting me know.
Wifey: No problem.

–N Train

Posted on May 4, 2008
Advice, Body Parts, Couples, Default, Excretions, Health and Hygiene, Men, Offers and requests, On the Subway, Public Transportation, Questions, Relationships, Weirdness, Women

I Hear Them Whispering Together in the Wee Hours of the Morning

30-something guy #1: I seriously need to get laid.
30-something guy #2: Yeah ya do.
30-something guy #1: I feel like I’m 14 again, and all the boobs in the world are conspiring to drive me crazy…

–40th & 8th

Overheard by: Sympathetic

Posted on May 4, 2008
Age/Aging, Default, Friends, Guys, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Nipples, Sex, Threats, Wishes & desires

I Have to Pregame Before I Can Shop With You

Mother: Are you still drunk?
Daughter: I wasn’t drunk yesterday!

–71st St & Broadway, Queens

Posted on May 4, 2008
Compare/Contrast, Default, Drinking & Drunk People, Girls, Moms, Parents, Queens, Questions

Default

My Next Question Was, “Did You Buy That at Hot Topic?”