Broke Mountain

Hobo #1: What’s my name, man? What’s my name?
Hobo #2: Shit…I know yo’ name…
Hobo #1: What’s my name? Yo’ name is Joe Smith. See, you don’t even know my name!
Hobo #2: I know yo’ name…but you gotta tell me yo’ name first.
Hobo #1: We in Heaven right now…if you see me, you not gonna know my name!
Hobo #2: Shit, we in Heaven right now? That’s fucked up!
Hobo #1: I told you my name like a hundred times. I’m Larry. What’s my name?
Hobo #2: You ain’t told me yet!
Hobo #1: All right…we in kindergarten now. What’s my name?
Hobo #2: Heaven. Man, that’s messed up.
Hobo #1: Man, I love you.

–A train

Overheard by: Mikey

Posted on May 5, 2015
Anger Management, Elementary & Middle School, Etiquette, Friendship, Hobos, On the Subway

Beggars Can’t Afford to Be Ideologues

Hustler for the homeless: Give 25 cents to end homelessness. Just 25 cents so America won’t be homeless. Excuse me, sir, do you want to help?
Suit: Nope. I don’t like America.
Hustler for the homeless: Well, have fun with your fucking Russian army, sir.

–Port Authority

Overheard by: Spoons

Posted on May 4, 2015
Etiquette, Flyer people, Port Authority, Suits

I Hope Blogging About It Is Okay

Crazy guy: Yo! Hey, Superman!

A dude with a Superman shirt looks horrified.

Crazy guy: Yo, man! I’m just like you! I’m Spider-Man!

He pulls up his shirt and yanks his underwear up out from under his pants, revealing a Spider-Man logo.

Crazy guy: See? You know, if you wasn’t a dude, I wouldn’t have shown you.

The Superman dude sees two younger girls watching and laughing.

Crazy guy: Yo, don’t talk about me when you get off the train!

–L train

Overheard by: Matthias

Posted on May 4, 2015
Crazies, Etiquette, On the Subway

He Should Go Back to “Dude”

White guy: Nigga, please.
White girl: That’s not okay. Don’t say that.
White guy: Nigga, thank you?

–L train

Overheard by: Alison F

Posted on May 2, 2015
Etiquette, Multiculturalism, Overheard Style, On the Subway

Interestingly, Not All Were Bad Motherfuckers

Guido father to daughter and her gay friend: He was a real cocksucker… (realizes gay friend might be offended) But you know…not in the, uh, bad way.
Gay friend: Oh, believe me, I've met plenty of bad cocksuckers.

–LIRR

Overheard by: bill

Posted on April 30, 2015
BJs, Dads, Default, Etiquette, Gays and Lesbians, Guidos, Insults, Queer guys, Trains Not Subway

How Could He Be Responsible from All the Way in Gaza?

Teenage boy, yelling at his iPod: Damn it, damn it, dammit! Damn stupid thing. Dammit!
Old lady passing by: You should be ashamed of yourself. Do you talk like that in front of your mother?
Teenage boy: Don't blame me, blame Jack Bauer. Damn it.

–Central Park

Overheard by: Haley

Posted on April 23, 2015
Boys, Central Park, Default, Education, Etiquette, Insults, Old People, Questions, Teens, TV, Women, Words

I Thought Federline Proposed

Girl #1: So you burped in his face and told him “Will you marry me?”
Girl #2: Yeah, pretty much.

–86th Street 4/5/6 station

Posted on April 16, 2015
Etiquette, Farting & Burping, Friends, Marriage, Subway stations, platforms, etc.

Inner Peace Isn’t All It’s Cracked Up to Be

Woman #1: Ma’am, could you please move your bag so I could sit down?
Woman #2: No, can’t you see I’m busy, bitch? And I’m not movin this fuckin’ thing. It’s heavy and I don’t want to pick it up again! Sit somewhere else.

She goes back to reading Jesus and Mary: The Key to Divine Love and Inner Peace.

–149th St station downtown platform

Posted on April 14, 2015
Ahhh! Real New Yorkers, Biotechs, Etiquette, Only in New York, Subway stations, platforms, etc.

At Last, Someone Who Shares My Passion!

Girl in line: And that’s when I told him that if he’s going to keep masturbating in a glass box, at least I shouldn’t have to… (stops, realizing everyone is listening)
Guy in line to friend: That is so going in my blog.

–Kimmel Center, NYU