Woman: I gave you my heart and you shitted on me!
Man: (mumbles almost inaudibly)
Woman: Come upstairs and stop causing a scene!
–Stoop, Ridgewood
Overheard by: Um…
Woman: I gave you my heart and you shitted on me!
Man: (mumbles almost inaudibly)
Woman: Come upstairs and stop causing a scene!
–Stoop, Ridgewood
Overheard by: Um…
Man at female stranger: Can I ask you a question? (woman just looks at him) Do you like…(pauses dramatically) mermaids? (woman crosses the street)
–Herald Square
Flamboyant man in sunglasses, after pushing his way into the closing doors: Whew, I made it, I don't have to wait 20 minutes… Where's my applause?
(two tourists applaud half-heartedly)
Flamboyant man: Thank you, thank you. Now don't you feel better now that you've applauded?
–A Train
Young suit on cell while at bar with coworkers: Yeah, I'm still at work right now, I'll call you when I'm done.
–The Dubliner Bar
Overheard by: Keekz
Young woman on cell: Hi, dad… Yeah, I'm in New York… Yes, I'm at Grand Central, I just got off the train.
–JFK Taxi Stand
Overheard by: Ilysse Weisenfeld
Earnest man on cell: Yes, no, I'm driving there. I'll be there in ten minutes. What? That's a passenger. Ten to twelve minutes… Hello? I can't talk, I don't have a headset.
–B Train
Overheard by: Emily
Skanky girl on cell walking down street at fairly slow pace: I'm like, running.
–7th Ave & 47th St
Overheard by: Serena
Man, loudly: It's been a long time since I fucked a racehorse.
Man's friend, reassuringly, to surprised bystanders: He's Irish.
–36th St & Madison
Overheard by: Bystanding Citizen
Man to girls in Armani store holding H&M bags: You like this stuff, girls?
Girls: Yes! It's fantastic.
Man: Well, stay in school, or you'll be shopping at H&M forever.
–Manhattan
Young black man, pointing to young black woman's reusable Trader Joe's bag: Where'd you get that?
Young woman: I don't know.
Young man: That's where white people shop, yo.
–Jamaica Ave & Parsons
Overheard by: white person
Hobo: Everyone, please believe me, I had nothing, I tell you–nothing, to do with this rain!
–6 Train
Overheard by: thanks for that clearing that up
Black guy sitting on stoop to white guy standing the rain: I can't offer you a warm vagina but I can offer you a dry haven.
–1st Ave & 7th St
Overheard by: D Dot
Hobo to sky, as it begins to rain: You gotta do better than drizzling if you want to flood the Earth! We got murders and rapists down here! There are pedophiles and traffickers and thieves and liars and idolaters! I'm ready: I got the life goggles you sent me! (holds up scuba mask) Thank you for making me in your image, Lord. Amen.
–24th St b/w Broadway & 6th Ave
Overheard by: EmLo
Man, as it begins to rain: Goddamn rain, man! Only in New York!
–Park Place & Broadway
Overheard by: Bo Vanderpants
Woman on cell: Yeah, the weather is beautiful this morning. I'm strolling like a motherfucker.
–Lexington & 90th St
Woman: That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me!
Man: I take it back.
–26th St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Guy blocking overcrowded subway car to elderly woman trying to squeeze by: Hey! You could say "excuse me!"
–Uptown N Train
Woman, eating falafel: I'm trying to stay away from fried foods.
–40th St
Five foot, 250-pound woman to friend: Wow! That girl in front of us is fat!
–42nd & 8th
Man on cell: Maybe you're the one with the fucking anger problem! Dick!
–Outside The Met
Overheard by: Yellow!
