Movies

Overweight geeky lunatic protester: The perpetual battery will last longer than any of us! The perpetual battery is the answer to all of our energy problems! It will draw its power from the very vacuum of space!

–Union Square South

Overheard by: Percival

Crazy old guy with beard and hat with lots of buttons: Where is the moon? Where is the moon, where is the galaxy? Have you ever seen Men in Black? It's all about the galaxy. The earth is beneath Columbus Circle. The moon is at 64th and Central Park West. If you had to suspend reality, how would you do it?

–Uptown 2 Train

Overheard by: Jingles

Professor: Has anybody ever seen a solar eclipse? Anybody, anybody? (silence) No? Well, maybe we were all inside on Facebook when it happened…

–St. John's University, Staten Island

Overheard by: Andrea

Visiting professor, explaining "word salad": Cream cheese to the moon mother, fuckers!

–Columbia University

Overheard by: Molly Moo

Obviously sober guy: I know Vikings eat ham, but what about Saturn?

–Rotating Cube Sculpture, Astor Place

Blonde: You cannot eat in space! It sucks you in.

–Union Square

Crazy bag man with hat full of buttons: Where's the moon, where's the moon? If the globe on Columbus Cirlce is the earth, the moon is on 63rd Street West. That is a test of spatial ree-al-uh-tee. How well did you do?

–Uptown 3 Train, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Les Izzmore

Angry girl: Your boner does not have super powers.
Dude: Yes, it does!
Angry girl: It won’t even point us in the right direction.
Dude: I never said it could do that.
Angry girl: You’re no Captain Jack Sparrow.

–W 3rd & Lafayette

Overheard by: danger

Daughter: You’re always humming that McDonalds song.
Mother: Huh?
Daughter: You know…”da da da da da I’m loooovin’ it.”
Mother: No, honey. Goldfinger. *Ba ra ba rum*
Daughter: Oh.

–Central Park

Yuppie #1: It’s just like in that movie, Good Will Hunting.
Yuppie #2: I never saw that.
Yuppie #1: What?! Dude, that movie’s like the voice of our generation!
Yuppie #2: Whatever.

–Northeast entrance to Madison Square Park

Contrubuted by: Scott Nybakken

Girl: I may be misinterpreting Rocky Horror Picture Show, but what gay man doesn’t love a movie about singing transvestites? These queens are so picky.

–30th and 5th

Overheard by: Megan Buckley

Hipster #1: This guy keeps following me around trying to get me to be in his movie.
Hipster #2: Ugh, I would never be in a movie!

–The Coral Room, Chelsea

Overheard by: Magpie

Girl ballerina: Have you seen The Taking of Pelham 123?
Boy ballerina: No. What is that about?
Girl: It's like… about two guys who hijack a 6 train.

–L Train

Overheard by: desmond barro

Teenage girl #1, looking at kid in cute Star Wars costume: Oooh, look at that kid!
Teenage girl #2: Oh, so you're a pedophile too?!
Teenage girl #1: No… I don't have to touch them.

–NYC Comic Con

Jersey woman #1: I wanna see that movie this weekend, I'm gonna go watch it at the theater.
Jersey woman #2: You gonna get those ladybugs all over you.
Jersey woman #1: Ladybugs?
Jersey woman #3: She means “bed bugs.”

–42nd St & Lexington

Perplexed girl #1: What is with that guy from Tokyo hotel? Is it a man or woman?
Perplexed girl #2: It's like a shim. I think it's like androgynous… Sort of like Pat!
Perplexed girl #1: Oh my god! That movie was the best! We should totally rent that and laugh hysterically at it. (starts singing) “It's time for androgyny, here come Pat!”

–2nd Ave