Metal chick: Why is it that everyone who goes away to college loves Dave Matthews Band or O.A.R.?
Friend: I don’t know, but they both suck.
Metal chick: That’s why I left school. I fucking hate Dave Matthews Band.
–Downtown 1 train
Metal chick: Why is it that everyone who goes away to college loves Dave Matthews Band or O.A.R.?
Friend: I don’t know, but they both suck.
Metal chick: That’s why I left school. I fucking hate Dave Matthews Band.
–Downtown 1 train
NYU chick as “Back in the USSR” plays: Why are they playing so much 80s music?
NYU dude: It's cool, it's The Beatles.
NYU chick: Such a weird song, like Russia's all great or something.
NYU dude: I think it's supposed to be ironic.
–Bleecker & Broadway
The bartender is wearing a Blondie shirt.
Guy: Do you even know who Blondie is? Do you know who JFK is?
Bartender: Were you even alive when JFK was alive?
Guy: I’ll bet you were born in 1982.
Bartender: Did anyone ever tell you how charming you are?
Guy: No!
–The Library, Avenue A
Dad: What’s this movie about? Squirrels?
Son, sarcastically: Yeah, evil squirrels. That’s why they call it Happy Feet.
Dad: I get my kids’ movies confused. But they all have a hedgehog. [About hip hop song intro] Those aren’t lyrics — he’s just rhyming.
–Lincoln Plaza IMAX
Older guy: This is classic Tupac before the gangsta rap.
High school girl: What you listenin’ to him for? He dead.
–31st & 7th
Headline by: Andrea
Runners-Up:
· “And Besides, His Grammar Is Sub-par” – Louis
· “John Edwards Radio: Dead Artists, Unfinished Buisness” – diana
· “My Anti-posthumousness Rule Also Applies to Literature. Shakespeare? Who Dat?” – Michelle
· “So? 3 Out Of 4 Americans Listen to That Jesus Guy!” – kh
White guy #1: Ready, I’magonna freestyle.
White guy #2: Bullshit, dawg.
White guy #1: Oooh girl dat ass is big and round and I like to hit it on the ground —
Passing black male: Give it up, cracker.
White guy #2: You gotta listen to me. Like the time with the syphilis, man, shit.
–51st & 9th
Overheard by: Lauren Michelle
Guy on Cell: Have you ever tried to masturbate while Michael Jackson’s “Rock With You” is playing in the background? Well, it’s more difficult than you think…
–Port Authority
Overheard by: Michael Roche
Thug #1: So get this: I'm getting a haircut and this guy on a power wheelchair comes in, with a big ass fur coat and is like… “Who want da new Tupac CD?” I was rollin!
Thug #2: Only in Irvington, ma nigga.
–86th & Broadway
Overheard by: Adam Bixler
Man handing out his CD: Scuze me, you like authentic Latino music? (woman flinches)
I ain't gonna bite you. Neither is the CD. Unless you're bitten with the sweet beat of salsa.
–2 Train
Older guy to younger date: So last night, right, I was a little drunker than I wanted to be and I was listening to those Beethoven and Mozart symphonies to, you know, really try to hear the difference between them…
–Uptown A Train
Woman walking out of a Chekhov play: Ugh! That was like taking a Tchaikovsky and playing it as if it were a Beeeeeethoven.
–Theatre District
Overheard by: Greer Feick
Happy older musician: I'm playing at the memorial concert for Ricky B*. Johnny T* was going to do it, but he died. I'm the go-to replacement when someone scheduled to play at a tribute concert dies.
–19th & 7th
Overheard by: tycho anomaly
Man on cell: Did you get the tickets? (pause) Eighty dollars to see a green bitch sing!?
–Chineese Restaurant, Columbus Ave
Punk guy: My Slayer button fell off my jacket when I was kicking that dude in the face, so I stopped and picked it up. Then I finished kicking.
–Tompkins Square Park
Overheard by: Rex Danger
