Guy: Wait, I missed that. So you were born, and then what happened?
–Brooklyn Botanical Gardens
Overheard by: Sherri Feldman
Guy: Wait, I missed that. So you were born, and then what happened?
–Brooklyn Botanical Gardens
Overheard by: Sherri Feldman
Caribbean woman: Will dis [wine cooler] drunk me?
Caribbean man: No, that won’t drunk you.
–Yvette Clarke for Congress HQ, Crown Heights
Teenage Girl #1: How much longer?
Teenage Girl #2: I think 3 more stops, then we get the L train.
Teenage Girl #1: You kidding me? It’s taking forever, I feel like we’re in Connecticut!
–C train
20-something woman on cell: Did I tell you mom got into a fight with a raccoon again? (pause) Yeah, I know, our mom is totally going to die of rabies.
–Starbucks, West Village
Overheard by: Vaccinated for rabies
Guy to another: Flap your wings baby, just flap your wings!
–Broadway
Woman, shouting at no one in particular: You know I'm unstoppable! I'm like an ox!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Rose Fox
NYU girl: My mother was like, "what would you do with a giant inflatable turkey?" and I was like, "what wouldn't you do with a giant inflatable turkey?"
–3rd Ave & 14th St
Overheard by: Mickey
13-year-old boy #1: Don't you remember that you told me my Bar Mitzvah was terrible?
13-year-old boy #2: When did I say that? I did not say nothing.
13-year-old boy #1: Don't you remember? You were talking to Eileen and you said I made a lot of mistakes. Don't blame me.
13-year-old boy #2: Don't blame you? You're blaming me! This is why we can't get together. Now we can't eat dinner together. We need conflict resolution.
–Barnes & Noble, 86th & Lexington
Brunette (looking at her crotch): Helllllllooooooo!?
Blonde: Are you talking to your vagina?
Brunette: No, my chlamydia.
Blonde: I think you’re talking to your vagina.
–Blockheads, 50th & 9th
Overheard by: Shirley
Guy, about Empire State Building: Yeah, and for Valentine's Day they put a heart on it.
Visiting Australian woman: A what? A hard-on?
–Rooftop, Watching 4th of July Fireworks
Overheard by: i saw one of those on a building once…
Old black man: Do you believe in black Jesus or white Jesus?
White girl: White Jesus.
Old black man: I knew there was something wrong with you the minute I saw you.
–2 Train
Conductor: This is the last train. You have no other options, this is it. Get on this train.
–Metro North Rail
Conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, please keep your feet off the seats on this train. They belong on the floor; that's why it's there. If you can't put your feet on the floor because your luggage is there, don't worry: we took care of that too. Look up. That thing above your head is a luggage rack.
–NJ Transit, Penn Station
Announcement on NJ transit train: If you have young children, please take them…by the hand when leaving the train.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: JerseyJR
Train conductor: This is 18th Street, if this is your stop…get up! Give up that seat!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Chris K… at 11pm
Amtrak conductor: We are experiencing engine problems and need to change trains. But I want you to know that we have lost no altitude.
–Amtrak Train
Conductor, philosophical about delayed train: We don't usually have this type of delay at this time of day. But, well, here we are… (train starts to move) Aha! Here it is!
–A Train
Overheard by: Katie J
Conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, do you know where you are? (passengers are silent) I do! Hudson, next stop.
–Amtrak Train, Leaving Penn Station
Teen #1, staring at gun with comma for trigger: So, what do you think it means?
Teen #2: It means: “as soon as I finish this sentence, I'm gonna kill you.”
–Museum of Modern Art
