Long haired guy: Jung would say I have a very low sensate rating.
Meathead: What? So you're retarded?
–Greenpoint, Brooklyn
Long haired guy: Jung would say I have a very low sensate rating.
Meathead: What? So you're retarded?
–Greenpoint, Brooklyn
Woman: It's so nice to be retired…
Man: “Retarded?”
Woman: That, too.
–28th & 5th
Overheard by: EHL
Hipster #1: And so then she said, “I'm not even turned on, I just think you're retarded…”
Hipster #2: Oh, dude. Did you guys still have sex?
Hipster #1: Yeah, it was okay.
–Broadway & Houston
Overheard by: Rachel
Moviegoer: Come on, I wanna see this potentially shitty movie!
–AMC Loews, 68th & Broadway
Overheard by: Robert Gleyberman
Guy on phone: I'm not trying to have sex with you, I just really want to see The Dark Knight.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Ross
Movie theater employee: I don't go to the movies. I watch them on the internet.
–AMC Loews, Lincoln Square
Overheard by: Holly
Guy on cell: Okay, love you, bye… Oh, and the reason she says "Foxy, you better work it out!" is because that's the name of her character in the movie.
–62nd & Broadway
Overheard by: Richard
Nerdy film major: Silent Night, Deadly Night II is the worst movie ever. It's so bad it's amazing. There's something cathartic about watching it; you leave thinking, "there is a god!"
–NYU Dining Hall
Guy leaving The Curious Case of Benjamin Button: You have to be some kind of anti-Christ to write a movie that retarded.
–AMC Loews, 68th & Broadway
Overheard by: Mark Nilges
Girl, as credits roll at the end of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button: Wow…they both lived way too long.
–AMC Loews, 68th & Broadway
Random girl: Mr. Smith*, you should come see the play tonight. I'm playing a retard and a Barbie!
Teacher: That must be quite a stretch for you.
–Bard High School Early College
Guy #1: Wait, so they make oranges out of meat?
Guy #2: No, they just call that part “the meat of the fruit.” There's no actual meat involved.
Guy #1: That's retarded! Who comes up with this shit?
Guy #2: I guess the people who grow the shit.
–Mott & Canal
Security guard to another: I know it's habitual to act retarded.
–Time Warner Security Check
Overheard by: spandangle
Security guard: The door's that way, people. I know that when you see a door you want to go through it–it's human nature.
–Crown Plaza Hotel, Times Square
Overheard by: GJL
Female security guard: What does my sexual genitalia have to do with it?
–Brooklyn Library
Little boy: Mommy, mommy, look! They've got security guards! Must be a rich people place.
–86th & Brooklyn
Security guard, after metal detector beeps: Ma'am, would you please remove your wooden bracelet and walk back through the metal detector again?
–Liberty Island
Overheard by: heather linford
Crazy security guard: I have so much gas. I'm going to take all my gas and send it to Iraq and end the war. (gets distracted by a girl walking past with an ice cream cone) Hey, you're stomach's gonna freeze!
–NYU Dorm
Overheard by: Honest Truth
Boyfriend: We are not getting a Down's Syndrome pet!
Girlfriend: What?
Boyfriend: You know, a pet you buy when you're down. We're not getting one!
Girlfriend: But I feel vulnerable and want to exert my will over something.
Boyfriend: No!
–Outside Petland Discounts, W 23rd St
Ditz #1: Did you know that when you snort while laughing you lose three brain cells?
Ditz #2: So you're saying if I snort for an hour I'm gonna be fucking retarded?
–F Train
Ten-year-old tourist girl wearing pink Crocs: Smoking is bad for you!
Smoking queer: Crocs are for retarded kids who can't tie their own shoes.
–50th St & Broadway
Overheard by: Scott
