Girl: Yo, I wish that shower gel wasn't seasonal. I mean, I know the soap smells the same, but if someone gets a hair on my shower gel I can shrug it off. I mean, I know you're trying to move to…
Sales girl: Less packaging, yeah.
Girl: And I'm all about being green and stuff but if I'm gonna pay fourteen dollars for a little tiny chunk of soap, I don't want to throw it out because of someone's business hair being all up on it.
–Cosmetics Store, Herald Square
Blond girl #1: And then I was like, “Why can't we just be separate but like…”
Blond girl #2: Yeah, separate but equal!
Blond girl #1: Exactly!
–Store, Times Square
Overheard by: michelle
Shop owner: Would you care to taste some wine?
Black woman (offended): No, I ain't tastin' no wine!
–Liquor Store, Brooklyn
Overheard by: thirsty wino
Brunette, after woman walks away from her: Oh great, now I can stick my hand up my skirt.
Blonde: Oh, perfect timing!
–Victoria's Secret, 86th St
Stroller mom admonishing toddler: Connor! Connor, stop that now. Connor, I'm going to count to three…in French. Un, deux, trois.
–Broadway & 93rd St
Father, teaching five-year-old son to urinate in the street: Okay, son, now you've gotta shake it.
–Fordham Road
Mom to seven-year-old daughter, on Yom Kippur: Only you could complicate a bagel purchase.
–Absolute Bagels, 108th & Broadway
Yuppie mommy to naughty child: Stop it! Stop acting up! Look, this is the reason people don't have kids.
–Starbucks
Woman to young sons: You see that boy in that other train over there? I'm gonna give him your present if you don't be quiet.
–6 Train
Father to three rowdy children: You guys are gonna need to calm down, this is gonna be a two hour ride and there is no bar car on this train. Which is unfair to daddies with 3 kids.
–Grand Central
Man: I'm sorry to disturb you, but was I mean to you in junior high school? You look just like her and I just want to apologize for anything mean I may have said to you.
Girl: I am not her.
Man: Wow, really? You look just like her and I want to say I'm sorry. So will you forgive me?
Girl: I am not her.
Man: But will you accept my apology?
Girl: I'm not her, um, but, um sure?
Man: You seem so hesitant, where are you from?
Girl: Arizona.
Man: Ahhh, Arizona! Did you come up with that outfit yourself.
–Barnes & Noble, Union Square
Overheard by: TheNewPaul
Boy on cell: A swimsuit and a medal? That's a lot of clothes to wear. Hello? Hello?
–NYU
Overheard by: Xy
Man to other sitting on sidewalk: Dude… you know, gloves actually make your hands colder. They're not worth it, man.
–Astor Place
Small Middle Eastern male cashier to white girl: You are wearing things all black! Black bag, black coat, black hair. The only thing not black is you!
–Duane Reade
NYU hipster: People wearing white are in a cult, okay?
–NYU
Overheard by: Boots
Blind lady carrying cane, pointing to clothing on rack: Oh, this this looks good!
–Kmart, 34th St
Overheard by: AussieinNYC
Goth female store employee #1: It's not like I'm amputating a leg.
Goth female store employee #2: Not technically.
–Manhattan Store
Short girl: Yo, Friday? I'm getting done. Done! Getting saucy. Saucy! With two double Es. "Sau-cee!" Like pasta! Nigga, I get buns!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Ben B.
Office drone to coworker: So yeah, they have this like big place in the city. But they have a patio and a garden and they cook every single night. They cook on their patio! But not like my cooking. Not cereal. They make braised lamb.
–32nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: Marie Z.
Teen on cell: Mmm, that peppercorn brandy sauce was gangster.
–72nd & Colombus
Overheard by: Lauren
Random dude: Maybe they'll let you put a biscuit on lay-away.
–KFC, 106th & Broadway
Guy on cell: So, I just need to get some toilet paper, tomato soup, and chain myself in the room for a while.
–Astor Place
Overheard by: Brigdh
Eight-year-old kid to mother, referring to generic cereal: Yo, they've got bootleg Froot Loops!
–Target, Atlantic & Flatbush
Overheard by: Ravi
Guy rushing past crowd: Why would I go to work on the day of Barneys Warehouse sale…are you insane?
–78th & Broadway
20-something white guy: Enough of this hippie shit. Let's go to the four floor Abercrombie.
–Strawberry Fields
Overheard by: Alison
Girl: I was so depressed. I actually almost bought that leather jacket from Express. Whose bright idea was it to have the MCAT testing center in a shopping district?
–1 Train
20-something woman to another: Wow, it's just like the Westchester mall here, only outside.
–Bleecker & W 10th
Very Caucasian tourist: Holy frick! Where is The Gap?
–42nd & Broadway
Middle aged woman in hot pink, yelling: I won't shop today! I will not shop! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I will not fucking shop today! I won't shop! Fuck you!
–Urban Outfitters
