Travel

Southern housewife #1, waiting for flight: Chinatown was scary–there was nooooobody that looked like us.
Southern housewives #2-#7: (all gasp)
Southern housewife #1: Noooooobody that looked like us!

–LaGuardia Airport

Older woman to friend: Down there where the servants are, you know, where the gardening people and the kitchen is, I don't go there. I just don't go there.

–38th & 5th

Overheard by: garden in manhattan?

Greek Princess shopping for wedding rings: This isn't the more expensive ring I wanted but we just bought an apartment in the 70s.

–Tiffany's Second Floor

Overprivileged teenage girl on cell: The bourgeoisie… The bourgeoisie are like, the common people.

–Union Square

College girl: No, I mean seriously: who, by the age of 25, has not been to Rome or Florence?

–Fordham University, Lincoln Center

Overheard by: Dan

Six-year-old: Mommy, how do you spell "Forbes"?

–Restaurant, Upper East Side

Overheard by: jess

Passport agent in airport to everyone waiting to go into customs: Everyone with a US passport, up against that wall!
Man in line: Have things changed that much?

— JFK Airport

Woman: Hey, we should go to Alaska sometime.
Man: Alaska? We can’t even find our way downstairs!

–Eskimo Diorama, American Museum of Natural History

Yuppie #1: I only went to Brazil for a month, but on my third day there I met her.
Yuppie #2: Women in South America are so hot. Especially Brazil and Spain.

–Belgian Beer Bar, Greenwich Village

Guy: I’ve been to Germany twice because I have a friend who’s from there. I went to Oktoberfest, but it was in June.
Hans: They had Oktoberfest in June? It must have been just for you…American tourists.

–25th St. & 3rd Ave.

Mom: I don’t know. I think you have to be, like, 21 to go to outer space.

–83rd & Amsterdam

A six-year-old stops coughing and asks: Mommy, why did you cover my mouth?

–Q Train

American tourist: Where you're from?
European tourist: Berlin.
American tourist: Ah, Berlin–that's sooo lovely!
European tourist: You been there?
American tourist: Well, almost… We've been to, like… Barcelona?

–E 42nd St

Aging woman with poor Botox: I've been all over the world. All over. Every continent, practically.
Friend: Where have you been?
Aging woman with poor Botox: I haven't been to Africa… Asia… I haven't gone to India or Russia… The Middle East… Uh… I've been to Europe a lot.
Friend: Where in Europe?
Aging woman with poor Botox: The Bahamas.

–Bleu, 187th & Fort Washington

Overheard by: RyanK

Father: Okay, girls, get your hairspray and turquoise eyeliner.
Daughter: Why?
Father: We're going to Staten Island!

–Hudson & Christopher

Overheard by: Seonachan