I Was Filled with the Holy Spirit –Until I Peed.

20-something girl: … And then he drank the holy water, wait, no. I drank the holy water, and he got sick, but I didn’t.
20-something guy: Did it cure your gout?
20-something girl, angrily: I don’t have the gout!

–Crowded Elevator, Atlantic Ave Station, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Tigertail

Posted on May 19, 2008
Brooklyn, Christianity, Compare/Contrast, Default, Drinking & Drunk People, Elevators, Girls, Guys, Illness, Questions, Subway stations, platforms, etc.

It’s Not a Party ’til Steve and Lucky Show Up

Bald white guy: You know Steve, right?
Asian woman: Steve? Who’s Steve?
Bald white guy: Oh, he’s the gay guy with the three-legged dog.

–43rd & 9th

Posted on May 19, 2008
Asians, Default, Guys, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Questions, We Love Our Pets, Weirdness, White People, Women

Don’t Bite the Hand That Steers You

Bus driver, on loudspeaker: If your stop is Main street, please get off here.
Punk high school kid in back of bus: Fuckin’ asshole!
Bus driver, on loudspeaker: Yo mama.

–Q88 Bus

Overheard by: quite amused

Posted on May 18, 2008
Boys, Bus Drivers, Default, Directions, Insults, Offers and requests, On the Bus, Public Transportation, Punks, Teens

Hmm, According to This, It’s a Musical

Guy: Wait, what part of New York is Chicago in?
Girl: What?! Chicago isn’t in New York! Chicago is its own state.
Guy: No, it’s not a state! It’s called the “windy city.”
Girl: Oh, right. I guess it is in New York then.
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: Hang on, I’ll look it up on my blackberry.

–Fordham University

Posted on May 18, 2008
Blackberry, Default, Fordham, Girls, Guys, Idiots, Names, NYC Geography, Questions, Stupidity, U.S. Geography

But the Arachnid Look Was Kinda Last-Season

Tacky girl #1: These shoes are too cute! [Points to a pair of shiny, patent leather heels.] Aren’t they totally cute?
Tacky girl #2: Yeah. So cute.
Tacky girl #1: So great… They’re like shiny little spider claws!

–Clothing Boutique, Greenwich Village

Overheard by: Amy

Posted on May 18, 2008
Compare/Contrast, Compliments, Default, Friends, Girls, Insects, Shoes, Store, The Village

No Drug Cures That

Girl: I think it’s because he’s a drug addict.
Boy: No it is not! I know a lot of drug addicts, and they are nice! He’s just an asshole.

–Epoca, Fort Greene

Posted on May 18, 2008
Boys, Brooklyn, Compare/Contrast, Compliments, Default, Drugs, Girls, Insults, Restaurants & Cafes

Reports of Mr. Hefner’s Bedroom Activities Have Been Greatly Exaggerated

Store clerk with thick accent: Condoms? Which one?
Old man: No! Cough drops! Cough drops!
Store clerk: Condoms? [points at condom boxes]Old man: Look at me… What the heck do I need condoms for!? Cough drops!

–Port Authority

Overheard by: Renz

Posted on May 18, 2008
9 to 5-ers, Age/Aging, Compare/Contrast, Condoms, Default, Language Barrier, Men, Old People, Port Authority, Wishes & desires, Words

I Hope You Don’t Think I’m a Hobosexual

[hobo walks into the train with bag in cart]Drunk queer standing behind hobo: Move it or lose it.
Hobo: Who the fuck is that?!
Queer: Queen Victoria.
Hobo: I’m a marine, I’ll fucking kill you.
Queer: Let me know when you get your VA check, I’ll help you spend it.
Hobo: Yeah, sure I’ll do that.
Queer: In Central Park.
Hobo: I’ll call you.
Queer: My number’s 444-332. Call me at that number.
Hobo: I won’t call you.
[they get off the train giggling]

–A train, Columbus Circle

Overheard by: JohnD