Fashionista #1: Oh my god, look — white pants after Labor Day — so trashy.
Fashionista #2: Ew. Yeah.
Fashionista #1: When is Labor Day, anyway?
Fashionista #2: I don’t know.
–SoHo
Fashionista #1: Oh my god, look — white pants after Labor Day — so trashy.
Fashionista #2: Ew. Yeah.
Fashionista #1: When is Labor Day, anyway?
Fashionista #2: I don’t know.
–SoHo
Second grader: Earth is the greatest planet in the whole world!
–125th St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Yes, I’m his teacher.
Little boy to younger brother in elevator: Stop! It’s like the hospital, you can’t touch anything!
–Columbia University
Overheard by: student
Little girl: Big Brother is watching!
–Franklin St & Church St
Overheard by: Jess McGins
Little boy: Yo, digit, you don’t get any pussy, how you gonna say she ugly?
–Corsa Ave, the Bronx
Overheard by: Edward Carney
Little girl to other little girl wearing school uniform: You look like a woman. Go change!
–116th St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Ken Yapelli
Little girl: Excuse me, where is the drugstore? I mean, where are the drugs?
–Duane Reade, 7th Ave & Flatbush
Overheard by: Cupcake
Little boy: I can’t wait to get home so I can scratch my crotch!
–6th Ave & 17th St
Lady #1: Is this express?
Lady #2, looking at her purse: Oh no, this is Prada
Lady #3: I think she was asking about the bus.
Lady #2: Oh…Can you believe I got this on sale?
–M4 Bus, going down 5th Ave
Overheard by: Lil wayne
Voice on loudspeaker: Ladies and gentlemen, someone has lost a pair of ladies’ red-rimmed eyeglasses. That’s a pair of women’s glasses with red frames, looking for you. Get it? Cause they’re glasses, looking for…Oh, nevermind.
–Queens County Farm Museum
Overheard by: amused visitor
Girl: I only like white wine in Paris
–Union Pool
Overheard by: Andrea
Hobo: I am a Vietnam veteran. I cannot work due to the effects of Agent Orange. Agent Orange was used in Vietnam to kill all the vegetarians.
–Uptown R train
Cop: So what does the red light mean, dat you gotta come to a complete stop?
–Downtown 1 train
Overheard by: Goueznou
Student to tourists: No, no. The black-draped building is Silver. The white building is Brown. See?
–Broadway & Mercer
Overheard by: booksandlibretti
Coast guard officer: Oh darn, I should have worn my pink coast guard hat today.
–South Street Seaport, Avon Breast Cancer Walk
Young professional woman, trying in vain to flag a cab uptown: I should have worn something sluttier today.
–25th & Park
Overheard by: Mike S
Business woman: All I need are some pasties, Daisy Dukes, and some four-inch heels. Then I’ll get a promotion.
–43rd & Lex
Overheard by: I thought that she worked in an office
Girl: The place is Salsa-ey, so dress a little slutty.
–St. Mark’s & 3rd
Overheard by: Ronnie Q
Tween girl in hot-pants and tight shirt: I can’t buy that. My mom doesn’t let me wear baggy clothes.
–Target, Atlantic Center, Brooklyn
Chick: I want hooker boots… but not in the heels. I want flats.
–Hunter College
Conservative guy: The second smartest person in this country is Ann Coulter. And let me tell you, she looks good in a pair of tight pants and Manolos at 2:30 in the morning.
–Metro-North
Overheard by: Stupid Liberal Hottie
Chick on cell: Well, then I don’t feel so bad about going in a little vinyl skirt if you’re just going to be wearing underwear.
–Harlem
Overheard by: McFreaky
American girl: Get yourself a fucking muffin and let’s go.
British boy: I don’t have any cash.
Girl: Use my credit card, I’m leaving now.
Boy: I can’t use your card. I don’t have your id.
Girl: They don’t check, they never check. You look like a woman, you look like a fucking transexual.
Boy: Really?
–Whole Foods, Union Square
Overheard by: johnjoseph bibby
Clerk #1: I’ve always wanted to start my own magazine.
Clerk #2: Yeah, but there are so many magazines out!
Clerk #3: I’ve always wanted to start my own T-shirt company.
–American Apparel, Brooklyn Heights
Overheard by:
Tourist lady #1, holding dress: Hmmm… I think I’m going to get the red one because it’s more Asian than the other ones. Right?
Tourist lady #2: Yeah, red is definitely more Asian.
–Souvenir shop, Mott St
Overheard by: Sannie
Guy to friends: Did anyone leave a belt at my house? I found one in my tree.
–LIRR
Overheard by: hbs
