Black lesbian: I’ve been in this neighborhood for so long.
Black gay guy: Mhh-hmmmh.
Black lesbian: Oh man! See that brownstone? Years ago I was invited to a wedding reception there. It was awesome. Beautiful. I was sitting right up front and laughing and crying with the rest of the family, like, I love you ladies! Damn, to this day, I still don’t know how the hell I got there, or who those bitches were.
–Bleecker & Christopher
Overheard by: grrryphon
Teen girl #1: What are we doing here?
Teen girl #2: Looking at handsome gay guys.
Teen girl #1: Why?
Teen girl #2: Because they’re more fun than straight guys, and they like it when you look at them.
–Christopher Street Pier
Overheard by: brad
Nerdy high school girl: I got a B+ on my freaking Holocaust essay. How gay is that?
–Q17 bus, Flushing
Overheard by: Lisa Berlin
Queerspotter: He’s so far inside the closet, he’s in Narnia.
–11th between 1st and A
Overheard by: Vinny C.
Drag queen: There are only two lesbian bars in New York, and that is because there are only five lesbians who tip.
–xl, 16th & 9th
Overheard by: Nick Salvato
Girl #1: I’m scared that I’m going to wake up one morning and be a lesbian.
Girl #2: Jesus, we’re in public.
–Rose Hill, Fordham University
Drunk girl: I wish you were straight.
Gay guy holding her up: Honey, I knew I was gay when I was born during General Hospital.
–53rd & 9th
Overheard by: Ciara DiSeta
Queer: Oh, I’m so glad to see you! I’ve been thinking about you’ I just read that book Radically Gay.
–Tekserve, West 23rd Street
Girl: Do you smell that? Smells like straight up pussy in this bitch.
Guy: I wouldn’t know.
Girl: What do you mean you wouldn’t know? It’s pussy.
Guy: I wouldn’t know. I’m gay.
Girl: Damn, son. So what does dick smell like?
Guy: Wouldn’t you know? I mean when you get on your knees?
–M14D bus
Overheard by: Janelle Someone
Guy #1: Oh my god, I know. I heard Versace is having a huge sale!
Man: Shut up, you damn queer!
Guy #2: He’s just mad because he can’t even spell Versace.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Nikki Starr
Girl: Well, as a lesbian, it’s not something I understand…
Guy: You mean, she’s a size queen?
Girl: I didn’t say that…but I don’t get it.
Guy: I don’t get it either. I mean, I’ve slammed into someone’s cervix, and it didn’t look like that was too fun for her.
Girl: Well, I guess you have nothing to worry about.
–Under The Volcano, East 36th Street
Girl #1: I can’t believe last year you had a boyfriend and this year you have a girlfriend! It’s like so nasty.
Girl #2: Oh please, next year you’re going to have a girlfriend too.
Girl #1: Hell no I ain’t. I made it through last year without a girlfriend and I’ll make it through this year too!
–6 train
Overheard by: Kimberly
