Nerd watching fireworks: I’m not really into the cerebral fireworks movement.
–The Great Lawn
Nerd watching fireworks: I’m not really into the cerebral fireworks movement.
–The Great Lawn
Chick: I just don’t really like running through the Hasidic neighborhoods in my sports bra…
Guy: Uh-huh.
Chick: It makes me feel uncomfortable.
Guy: Yeah.
Chick: So I don’t think I’m going to do that anymore.
–Bogart & Moore St, Bushwick
Overheard by: Erin
Headline by: TWWS
Runners-Up:
· “But I’m Still Wearing My Swastika Thong.” – Craig should be working
· “Do I, Uh, Know You?” – clash
· “I Didn’t Hear Anything but ‘bra'” – 6th Floor Blogger
· “I’ll Try Yarmulke Pasties Instead” – Katie
· “Too Many Guys Trying to Challah at Me” – Rottin’ in Denmark
· “Topless It Is” – Sean McGurr
Teen to hobo tossing empty bottle on the ground: Hey, don't leave that here! Kids play around here!
Hobo: I hate kids.
Random passerby: You can't beat that logic!
–Central Park
Man walking dog: Yo, take a shit right here.
–Houston & Mangin
Overheard by: How about a little to the left?
Woman to her gang-banging pug dog: Everyone can have love together!
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: riana
Man to Yorkie, tugging at leash outside porn shop: You don’t want to go in there. Nothing you could use in there… Hmmm, except maybe the rubber goods.
–28th & 8th
Overheard by: Chuckell
Upset man to black lab walking sheepishly beside him: They didn’t want you in there because you’re black, and they should have the guts to say so! We should go back to that fucking place and burn it down! [Pats pooch on head.] Good girl. You’re a good girl. [They start walking away again, and man mutters to himself] Motherfuckers.
–W 4th St
Student: Do you hate me, Mr Jones*?
Mr Jones*: I usually don't admit it, but in this case…
–Stuyvesant High School
Conductor: Hey, no crying on the train! No crying on the train!
–1 train
Man: I make people cry, and you tickle them.
–Wall St
Girl: You’re making me wanna shed mad tears!
–Lower East Side
Mom to young daughter: I think Daddy cries because he cares.
–JFK
Drunk guy: Jim? Jim! I don’t think we can be friends anymore… I cried after the Super Bowl.
–Waverly & Broadway
Woman on cell: I call her at work sometimes, and I’m like ‘Hi, Beth,’ but I can’t hear her because she’s sobbing.
–22nd & Park
Overheard by: Champ
Tween: I made a babysitter cry once. She was so immature.
–Brooklyn-bound R train
Drunk girl: Fuck you. Get a job. ]Lightly pushes guy. No response.] I said, fuck you. Get a job! [Pushes him harder.]Guy: Stop pushing me.
Drunk girl: Fuck you. Get a job!
Guy: Stop pushing me.
Drunk girl: Fuck you! Get a job! [Pushes him down.]Guy: What the hell?! I have a job! I have a job!
Drunk girl: I don’t care! Get a job!
–St. Mark’s & 1st
Overheard by: Darien
Pretty boy: You know, penis density is really an under-appreciated quality.
Fat friend: Yeah, I may have a one-and-a-half-inch dick, but it weighs 50 pounds!
Girlfriend to other chick: At least they aren’t talking about circle jerks anymore.
–35th & 9th
Overheard by: Brad
Worker: … Just stick it in your pocket. I mean, seven inches isn’t bad.
–Grand Central Station
Overheard by: EthanK
Guy: So I tried to set my password to "Penis".
Girl: […]Guy: It said my password wasn’t long enough.
–66th & Broadway
College kid to girlfriend: You make me feel sometimes like ten inches isn’t enough.
–12th St & Broadway
Overheard by: Strand Customer
Asian girl on cell: It’s six inches. [Laughs.] Wait… What’s six inches?
–CUNY Queensborough
Drunk guy pissing against wall, on cell: I got my dick out at 14th street! Yeah, it’s 14 inches!
–Union Square
Young office peon: Stan*, I have a question, but first, how are you this morning?
Old office peon: Well, I had only four hours of sleep, I am still very drunk, and even though I showered, I still have stripper stank on me… So, what was your question?
Young office peon: Never mind.
Old office peon: Okay, cool.
–Queens
