Girl: But Gandhi — he, like, did so much for the world. He helped humanity.
Guy: Yeah, but we still shouldn’t have to write a paragraph about him.

Flint Hall, Syracuse University
Syracuse, New York

Overheard by: ears burning

Paralytically drunk trainee Russian orthodox priest, lying on pool table, smoking a joint: Fuck! I've got to get to church in two hours…

Leamington Spa

Overheard by: Bleep

Skinny sorostitute: Every time I see him he just makes me want to throw up.

Arizona State University

Overheard by: Lindsay

Man to wife, thoughtfully: Everything south of San Francisco could just… just fall into the water, and it wouldn’t really matter.

Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Catherine

Mother weighed down with shopping bags: Mummy needs a coffee now, honey.
Six-year-old daughter: But Mummy, I wanna look at–
Mother: –Mummy needs coffee or she will die.

Greensborough Plaza, Main Road

Girl #1: I'm having the worst day today.
Girl #2: Yeah, it's a good thing I had sex yesterday. Otherwise, today would just be hell.

Seattle, Washington

Chick: Well, my mom wouldn’t let me on the train until I wore pants, so there ya go.

Southmoor station
Aurora, Colorado

Girl to friend: That’s the last time I catch a falling baby.

Farmington Valley, Connecticut

Girl to guy : Stop raping my bellybutton! If I wanted you to rape it, I’d let you!

Girl #1: Oh, god. It’s freezing! Fuck life!
Girl #2: You mean, fuck the weather.
Girl #1: No, fuck life… And fuck random people telling me I have ADD!

Overheard by: dela