JAP girl on line: Why would I be boogieing at temple?
–H&M
Overheard by: Sandjiggie
Redhead JAP: It's too bright, I can't hear you…
–41st & 3rd
JAP: Is saving the whales still, like, a thing?
–F Train
20-something JAP on cell: I mean: I don't want to say that I live in a bubble, but the only people I've spoken to in the last week and a half are you and my doorman.
–42nd St & Lexington
Overheard by: Pete
JAP: Can you believe it’s snowing upstate? It’s crazy.
Hispanic delivery man: Yeah.
JAP: Can you believe that that Yankee died? It’s crazy.
Hispanic delivery man: Yeah.
–Empire State Building
JAP: I like, didn’t even know I had a middle name until my bat-mitzvah.
–53rd & 8th
Overheard by: Phil
JAP #1: Isn’t The Pursuit of Happyness an action movie? Because he needs money–
JAP #2: –Not all black people need to shoot people for money.
–Lehman College cafeteria
Overheard by: can’t breathe
JAP on cell: If more people wore glitter there would no war.
–Therapy Store
Crazy old guy: I want a dog for president. You know why? Dogs don't start wars.
–31St & Ditmars, Astoria
Overheard by: Randi and Patrick
(at an anti-war rally)
Street vendor: Say no to war, say yes to Louis Vuitton!
–Midtown
Overheard by: Oh the irony
50-something guy on cell: You see, we are a military agency, not a government agency. (pause) So when I punched out that Homeland Security guy, I punched out a civilian.
–Union Square Park
Overheard by: Ksenia
Eight-year-old boy: I dare you to fight in the civil war!
–7 Train
Professor: We will talk about the JDC–the American Jewish Joint Distribution Committee. And no, they were not dispensing marijuana.
–Queens College
Overheard by: ShaniP
Trashy JAP on cell: So I told her I was selling, and that bitch was like, "Katrina, for how much?" And I was like "Oh my god, mom, it doesn't matter how much the weed is going for, all that matters is the quality!"
–7th Ave, Park Slope
Overheard by: penelope
Random stranger to teens: You want to buy some weed? Just come back to my mom's house!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Rhian
College student on cell: Mom, you've got to stop smoking so much weed. I mean, fuck!
–Time Square
Random dude on street: I got it all! Liquor, alcohol, marijuana, Chips Ahoy! I got it!
–44th & Broadway
Overheard by: Lagster
Street vendor: Prada bags, Louis Vuitton bags, Gucci bags, marijuana bags… (everyone looks over at him) Hey, I gotta make money somehow.
–Times Square
Overheard by: mary jane
JAP: Oh my god, I can’t wait to move into the city. I can’t take my house anymore, my parents are always up my ass. Gabby, what time will you be home? Gabby, don’t forget to tell Rosa to pick up your dry cleaning! Gabby, we’re paying your tuition, you can’t treat this house like a hotel! It’s so annoying! I just wanna be on my own, I can take care of myself, I don’t need them constantly doing stuff for me!
Friend: Yeah… So where were you thinking of moving?
JAP: I dunno, my dad said he might let me move into his apartment on 89th. Either that, or a partner at his firm is selling a co-op that he might buy for me. He said I can choose.
–Uptown W train
Chick #1: Sometimes I wonder if my Jewishness has more to do with living in New York.
Chick #2: I totally know what you mean. Like, how Jewish would we be in California?
–7th St, between 1st & Ave A
Headline by: Kevin
Runners-Up:
· “Fantastic Goyage” – j3rry
· “I Think More Than Madonna, Less Than Jesus” – alex gherardi
· “Like, Do These Tefillin, Like, Make My Wig Look Fat?” – Herbie McHebrew
· “Putting the El-Al in LA” – kerm
· “We Still Wouldn’t Swallow, but We’d Spit Cooler” – RaindanceRichard
JAP: I can't believe all these people would come to New York to hang out in a mall.
Guy: We're here.
JAP: At least we only came from downtown.
–Bouchon Bakery, Time Warner Center
Overheard by: jj
JAP #1: I think I’m going to break up with him. He really has, like, no money.
JAP #2: Really?
JAP #1: Yeah. He, like, doesn’t even have an iPod.
–116th & Broadway
