Guy: So I was talking to my grandfather last night.
Girl: The one who survived Auschwitz?
Guy: No, the one who died there.
–A train
Overheard by: Greg Pierce
Guy: So I was talking to my grandfather last night.
Girl: The one who survived Auschwitz?
Guy: No, the one who died there.
–A train
Overheard by: Greg Pierce
Girl #1: …so, my professor started talking about The Diary of Anne Frank.
Girl #2: Oh, Anne Frank! I used to love her! I had the diary, the notebooks and the pencils and everything.
Queer: What?
Girl #1: I think she means Lisa Frank.
–27th & 7th
Serious 40-something man to five-year-old girl: So why do I always have to be the one to buy dinner?
–8th Ave & 44th St
Overheard by: Dean
Mother to toddler: Why you always gotta sing Barney? Always Barney! You are so annoying! I'm sick of Barney.
–1 Train
Middle-aged Jewish man to eleven-year-old girl: But I don't think you have to worry about that, Talia, because there are very few Zoroastrians around these days.
–93rd & Broadway
Ghetto father making out with ghetto girl, to two-year-old tugging at his jeans: Nigga, stop cock-blockin me!
–Fordham Road
Overheard by: Laura
Angry mom to eight-year-old son: When I find that brick, you're in big trouble!
–Kane St & Clinton St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Phycobilins
Emphatic mom to child holding her hand: You've gotta hold my hand! I'm forty-six years old and I still hold my mommy's hand! I'm forty-six years old! So you've gotta hold my hand!
–50th & 9th
Overheard by: Christiana Little
White wife: The rabbi told me that most of the government officials there are currently African American…
White husband: Okay…
White wife: But that he’s going to be running for city council in the next election…
White husband: That’s good…
White wife: He said that lots of Southern towns now have African American city officials…
White husband: I know…
White wife: But that even though the town is majority African American, it has a good chance of coming back.
White husband: Honey?
White wife: Yes?
White husband: It’s just us here. You don’t have to keep saying ‘African American.’ You can say ‘schvartze.’
–Actor’s Temple, W 47th St
Overheard by: Big Larry
Tourist guy: Excuse me, do you know how to get to the PATH train?
Hasidic man: Are you Jewish?
Tourist guy: No.
Hasidic man: Ask the policeman.
–42nd & 6th
Overheard by: B. McClintock
Yuppie: You’re such a third-generation American Jew.
— Upper West Side
Asian chick #1: The thing is, he’s a Jewish guy? And like, ya know, a lot of Jewish guys are in to Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah?
Asian chick #1: Yeah. I think it’s like because, like, both cultures are so, like, into family? Like Jews are really into family and Asians are really into family?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.
Asian chick #1: But also? I think he kind of has an Asian fetish?
Asian chick #2: I hate that.
Asian chick #1: Yeah. He’s like…ya know. A nerdy Jewish guy who likes to date Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.
Asian chick #1: Yeah, but he’s really cute in that way that he’s nerdy but he loves Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.
–N/R 8th street station
Professor: So, when we last left the Jews they were suffering. But, then, we can take that for granted.
–Stern Building, NYU
Overheard by: Jayso
Woman to queer: … All the Jews I’ve ever seen have had the most marvelous penises.
–E 4th St & 2nd Ave
Drunk girl looking at Jewish frat boy: Wearing a kippah is like wearing a cage around your penis.
–Frat party, Columbia
Overheard by: I never go to frats bc…..
Long Island girl: Wait… What is Friday Night Lights? Is that a movie about Shabbat?!
–LIRR
Guy: I’m like Jewish, but I’m not. I look Jewish.
Girl #1: Yeah, this one time we were at a diner and he was like, “What can I get for $3?”
Girl #2: So, that’s why you assumed…
Girl #1: Yeah, he’s so Jewish.
–1 train
Overheard by: Alix
Rabbi: So, what was the best part of your week?
College Jew: Hmmm… I guess reading for three hours in the library.
Rabbi: Oh? What did you read about?
College Jew: Hitler.
–NYU Hillel
Overheard by: YJD
