Manhattan

Girl: Paris Hilton has a fragrance?! What’s it supposed to smell like, unwashed crotch?

–Manhattan Mall

Overheard by: Rainey

Med student #1: Some people say that The Passion of The Christ doesn’t follow the book.
Med student #2: What book?

–122nd & Amsterdam

Overheard by: Khalilah

Guy on phone: It’s funny. As a kid, all I wanted was to live on the Upper West Side. And now I’m leaving it to move to Brooklyn.
Passerby: As a kid, you were an idiot.

–83rd & Columbus

Overheard by: Jonas

Guy: Yo, Katie, why do you always gotta look at me like I just looked at your ass or somethin’?
Katie: Well, because most of the time you usually are!

–Cheap Shots, 1st Ave between 9th & St.Mark’s

Overheard by:

Little boy, to passerby: That’s why I ejaculated in your mom’s nose!

–Prospect Park, Brooklyn

Chick: See, I don’t like the idea of drinking semen not directly from the cock.

–Harlem

Overheard by: McN

Suit #1, leaving: Nice out?
Suit #2, entering: Hot n’ humid!
Suit #1: Lots of sluts?

–Office building, 6th Ave

Overheard by: Non suit

Teen boy: I swear, I’m going to ejaculate on your countenance.
Teen girl: Dude, what the fuck?

–Central Park

Overheard by: notgoingtoask

Black woman: You know that girl you bumped into? She was handicapped. And you didn’t say, “Excuse me.”
White boy: Um, she bumped into me.
Black woman: So, she’s handicapped. Is it her fault?
White boy: Shut the fuck up and go pick up your welfare check, you entitlement-addicted bitch.

–53rd & 5th

Little girl: Mom, look! I saw that lady on TV! That lady is on TV!
Mom: What lady? Where?
Little girl: That fat lady! That fat lady over there is on TV!

–Dinosaur BBQ, W 131st St

Overheard by: Alison R.

Boy #1: Damn it! I forgot my iPod.
Boy #2: Don’t worry. The city is a soundtrack in itself.

–44th & Broadway

Overheard by: Liz