Mother: We're getting off now if you can't behave.
Boy (screaming uncontrollably at other boy): I want Jessie! I want Jessie! I want Jessie! Jesssssssssie!
–M79 Bus
Overheard by: whothehellisjessie
Mother: We're getting off now if you can't behave.
Boy (screaming uncontrollably at other boy): I want Jessie! I want Jessie! I want Jessie! Jesssssssssie!
–M79 Bus
Overheard by: whothehellisjessie
Girl on phone: Yeah, I'm here. But I think I passed through the ghetto on the way. Yeah, it was definitely the ghetto. How do I know? It was really obvious: because I saw a sizzler and all the buildings looked the same!
–Penn Station
20-something girl, watching street protest: They better not have closed Popeyes for this.
–M Bus
Overheard by: BHM
Tiny white girl: I just want to go into Applebee's and punch everyone in the face.
–Times Square
Overheard by: that would pass the time…
Girl on cell: Look mom, there's a Jamba Juice. That place is like famous.
–Herald Square
Slob tourist chick to fat husband: I hate my life! Ooooh, Olive Garden!
–Times Square
Overheard by: BarcLeh
Short girl: Yo, Friday? I'm getting done. Done! Getting saucy. Saucy! With two double Es. "Sau-cee!" Like pasta! Nigga, I get buns!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Ben B.
Office drone to coworker: So yeah, they have this like big place in the city. But they have a patio and a garden and they cook every single night. They cook on their patio! But not like my cooking. Not cereal. They make braised lamb.
–32nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: Marie Z.
Teen on cell: Mmm, that peppercorn brandy sauce was gangster.
–72nd & Colombus
Overheard by: Lauren
Random dude: Maybe they'll let you put a biscuit on lay-away.
–KFC, 106th & Broadway
Guy on cell: So, I just need to get some toilet paper, tomato soup, and chain myself in the room for a while.
–Astor Place
Overheard by: Brigdh
Eight-year-old kid to mother, referring to generic cereal: Yo, they've got bootleg Froot Loops!
–Target, Atlantic & Flatbush
Overheard by: Ravi
Blonde chick to dude: Isn't he, like, koreish?
–F Train
Dude on cell: It's not even like a relationship, it's all texting, it's a textationship.
–22nd & 1st
Overheard by: loves it
Girl on cell: She was all slippy and shit.
–SoHo
Student to another: The trouble with you is that you got the wrong misconception.
–Broadway & 116th
Overheard by: Cousin Al
Mom, upon examining young son's pruney toes: Jake! What's wrong with your toe? Look, the skin is coming off, it's like you're molding! Just like a little bird! Your foot is molding!
–Prep School Swimming Pool
Overheard by: I dream of Jean
Teen on payphone: Listen! Mah words isn't what I'm sayin!
–Fulton & Broadway
Overheard by: Mondo Man
Woman on cell: You thought he was gonna shit on you? Sit? Spit? You gonna need to step up your English game.
–Fulton Street Subway Station
Overheard by: Johnny Twisto
Disgusted mother to little girl who picked up a Swedish fish she dropped on the bus floor: Don't eat that.
Little girl, dusting it off: It's okay, I'll kiss it up to god.
Mother: Don't you dare put that in your mouth. You have no idea what was on the floor.
Little girl, putting it in her mouth and chewing it: It's okay! I kissed it up to god! (swallows it) What are you going to do about it?
Mother, angrily: I'm not going to do anything. You're just going to die.
–Q18 Bus
Mom: Where do you want to eat honey?
Six-year-old daughter: Not a bar!
–West Village
Overheard by: Aidan
Yuppie mom #1: It's very blocks focused.
Yuppie mom #2: Blocks?
Yuppie mom #1: Yes, it's a very progressive school. They do very perverse things with the blocks.
Yuppie mom #2: Um, I don't think I understand.
Yuppie mom #1: You know, they use the blocks in literature, in math…if they want to play kitchen, they have to build the kitchen first. It's very progressive.
–12th St & Broadway
Overheard by: Jenny
Excited young girl pointing at subway sign: That says “subway”!
Mother, dismissively: No, it doesn't.
–Union Square
Mother: He doesn't have any bones in his legs.
Teenage daughter: Nuh-uh! What does he do?
Mother: He goes all around the world, spreading joy to everyone.
–48th & Broadway
Overheard by: Jess
Kid at SantaCon : Mom, what kind of Santa is that?
Mom: Well honey, it looks like a furry snow disco Elvis Santa.
–Madison & 35th
Overheard by: Colleen
