Exhausted woman with backpack: Why do I have to be so fat?
–42nd St
Gossip Girl clone to another: Oh my god! Can you even imagine being obese in this weather?
–Lafayette & Spring
Skinny gangster white boy: Yo, dude, are we hanging out with those fat chicks?
–96th St & Lexington
Overheard by: great standards
Chubby girl yelling on cell: Yeah, and her bridesmaid dress totally accentuates my back fat–as if I didn't have enough problems!
–47th & 3rd
Skinny chick #1: Shut up, bitch! I can totally see your rib cage.
Skinny chick #2: Well, that's only because I have a skinny rib cage!
–Plumm Bar, West Village
Overheard by: everyone wants to be fat, but not really
Guy on phone on Halloween night: So I realize it's last minute, but we need a fourth ghostbuster… and you are black.
–3rd Ave
Overheard by: Supertaint
Teenage girl to group of friends: Ya know, I used to think that John Lennon and John Legend were the same person. Every time I saw John Legend I thought, "damn, that's whack that John Lennon would walk around in black face!"
–M116 Bus, East Harlem
Overheard by: NC
20-something black guy to 20-something white girl: It's New Year's Eve, baby–have sex with a black man tonight! Have sex with a black man on New Year's Eve! (girl laughs, turns to look at him) Hey–it don't have to be me! It's New Year's Eve, have sex with a black man tonight!
–Suffolk & Delancey
Passenger, about ghetto kids who just got off train: Damn, they were like the black Jersey Shore!
–Uptown 2 Train
Overheard by: kids these days
20-something woman #1: She's an adult, and she still doesn't know how to blow dry her own hair!
20-something woman #2: I know! And she looks like shit when she comes into work.
20-something woman #1: It's absolutely disgusting!
20-something woman #2: Everyone is all wearing makeup and she's just not!
20-something woman #1: I know it's not in your job contract to blow dry your hair, but come on!
–1 Train
Drunk guy: I summon all the single ladies to my personal sleeping quarters. Somebody come up here and kiss me! I'm an outstanding kisser and an excellent swing dancer! Girls, boys, hermaphrodites, I don't care!
Drunk guy's friend: If you think this is bad, you should've seen him at the Billy Joel concert… He peed on my foot.
Drunk guy: Only because you were wearing sandals!
–Citi Field Stadium
Guy dressed only in tighty whiteys to bartender: I know I'm only wearing underwear, but can you please turn up the air conditioning?
Bartender: Yeah.
Guy dressed only in tighty whiteys: I'm speaking on behalf of several people. Well, other people who might come in here in their underwear.
–The Ritz, Hell's Kitchen
Student #1: Hey, look! He has pimples on his tongue!
Student #2: No, idiot, those are taste buds.
–Bard High School Early College
Teenage boy in suit to others: Apparently I look a lot like Lady Gaga.
–42nd St
Overheard by: model UN delegate
Elderly man to elderly woman: Gaga… What's a gaga? He went to see Lady Gaga! Gaga… Gaga? Gaga? (goes on for some minutes)
–Downtown A Train
Overheard by: Jill
Girl to friends, all singing Lady Gaga: I just want to take her face and put it in my vagina. That's how obsessed I am with Lady Gaga.
–7th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: Stephanie
Girl: Lady Gaga is not going to sit on your face.
–12th St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Cass
Girl #1: Wow, look at that building all lit up over there!
Girl #2: That's the Empire State Building.
Girl #1: It's so glowy!
–West Village
Overheard by: Emily B.
Girl in truly ridiculous dress: I am a strong, independent woman! I don't need a man in my life!
Friend: Amy*, you're wearing pink and ruffles.
–Lincoln Center
