Small boy: So abortion isn't like killing, it's like stopping?
Small boy's mother: Yes, honey…it's all very complicated, but, some people think that a baby can't be killed when it's inside the womb because it's not really a baby yet.
Small boy: So, it's not a baby till it's out?
Small boy's mother: That's right.
Small boy: And then we can kill them?
–M103 Bus
Overheard by: Lilly
Passenger to Asian girl carrying strange bag: Is that a didgeridoo in your bag?
Asian girl: Excuse me?
Passenger: Is that a didgeridoo in you bag?
Asian girl: Oh no, it's my sword.
–Elevator, 39th St
Overheard by: Baby Dinosaur
Crazy guy, about Scottish Deerhounds: See, they've got personality. They're enjoying themselves. They've got four legs, but we say we're smarter? I wish I had four legs.
German owner of Deerhounds: Then you couldn't open doors.
Crazy guy: But what if one of my front paws had a hand? Then I could open doors.
–Marcus Garvey Dog Run, 120th St & Madison Ave
Overheard by: anna
Guido #1, outside gay bar, putting arm around another: Are you aware that this is the faggot spot?
Guido #2: Get the fuck off me, man!
–Union Square
Overheard by: amused
Jogger #1: I heard some really good advice the other day. Apparently, the key to life is running and reading.
Jogger #2: Who said that?
Jogger #1: I think it was either Will Smith or Barack Obama.
–E Train
Overheard by: Philips
Teenage girl #1: We are getting older and going through puberty, we have a lot of new stuff to learn.
Teenage girl #2: Yeah, like you just taught me about keefing, or what was it queefing? Yeah, queefing.
–Central Park
Boy: It's like Jesus Christ, or Jackson Pollock.
Girl: Do you, like, know the people at this party we're going to?
–Union & Metropolitan, Williamsburg
Buff 20-something black guy: Yeah, she was that one I was going out with last summer.
Tall 30-something black guy: So what happened?
Buff younger black guy: She got fat! In like two weeks! And also, she was cheating on me: she never told me she hadn't broken up with her boyfriend at the time!
–Planet Sushi, Amsterdam Ave
Overheard by: Susan Volchok
Gramps: Those bags from the store…
(children and mother laugh).
Mother: You're talking very loud.
Gramps: What–are we in church? Did I wake somebody up?
(children and mother continue laughing)
Gramps: What did I do wrong? Should I go sit outside?
–Doctor's Office, Central Park West
Overheard by: Erick B
Woman: It's so nice to be retired…
Man: “Retarded?”
Woman: That, too.
–28th & 5th
Overheard by: EHL
